Regular lurker, this is my first post. I know there has been previous threads about this, just don't want to feel like I'm hijacking it. Anyways, here goes my story: I'm a straight female but have to admit that I'm at least a little bit bicurious. Not that I think I'll ever go through with it (being with another woman). Well, I often have fantasies about women and wish that I was a guy, meaning I wish I had a penis. I feel like men just have it so much easier when it comes to life in general as well as relationships with women. But because I'm not looking to follow up on my curiousity toward women I don't really get it. I know it's probably just penis envy. But why? Is it normal for a straight woman to experience penis envy? Or does it maybe mean that I'm trans*? It's not really invasive but is a recurring thought and fantasy, which kind of scares me. The fantasies about women are only with me in a male role, and that is also quite confusing to me. I don't know what I am or what it makes me, is it normal to have these thoughts and feelings? I'd love to be able to feel what the male orgasm feels like, I'd love to have balls to scratch, to stand and pee and to wear whatever I want with that "Meh, I don't care about my appearance" sort of attitude that some men seem to have. (Not that they are sloppy or anything, just seem to be so natural and comfortable with themselves). I don't know. This turned out to be a big ramble. Hope you can make sense of it. Thanks in advance :icon_wink
First of all, welcome to EC! Glad to see another fellow South African here :icon_bigg I identify as a tomboyish female and often have these exact thoughts and feelings. But I don't think that, that makes me transgendered or anything. It's like you say, just penis envy. I know there are many lesbians who wish they had a penis so they can satisfy their partner "properly" and "naturally" but that doesn't make them transgendered. I think in those cases, it's more about wanting to please their partners than anything else. I sometimes grab my pants/crotch area as though I have a penis, and I like to put myself in the mindset of a man. Mostly because (I think) I feel I am "one of the guys" and therefore, should have the same "equipment," not so? It would certainly be awesome to be able to take a leak standing up, and being able to jerk off and have sex while in a male body. To feel what they feel and experience things just so much differently. So on those things, I can totally relate. To answer your question, I don't think it means you're trans*. I'm not sure what it means then or which label you fall under, but you're definitely not alone in your quest. I hope you can figure it out soon so your questions will vanish. But be patient, you will find the answers eventually. Best of luck to you ADD: You don't mention your age, so if you're still quite young, it could just be hormones acting up?
Sorry! Forgot to change the settings that would display my age. Fixed that now. Even at a later age I feel that it is quite possible for someone to have mixed up hormones that throw things out of whack and creates these strange feelings or thoughts. I'm glad though that I'm not the only one having these feelings and thoughts. But it's still confusing to me because why do I get them? I'm not a tomboy and certainly not a lesbian, so why do I get these thoughts and feelings? That's what's so confusing and annoying to me :bang: But thank you so much for taking the time to reply, it certainly helps to get it off my chest and talking to someone who can relate to what I'm feeling
