So, I've finally made the decision to come out. I'm going to start slow, and I hope this is the best approach. Tomorrow, my mom and I are spending the day together, and I want her to be the first to know. Is there a better way of coming out than simply throwing her a curveball? Or would "I'm gay" work out well? Just looking for some input. I've been reading some of the coming out stories, and hope that my experience works out as well as some that I've read about.
I came out to my friend on Sunday, and I was sort of dithering about it and I decided to just say 'there's something you should know. I'm gay.' It worked for me! What to say depends on what you're comfortable with saying and what kind of person your mum is. If she's very accepting, then you may as well just say 'I'm gay'. Good luck! Let us know how it went!
I'd personally steer the transition toward gayness in general, asking her opinion, etc. not only to test the waters, but because I just love smooth transitions. However way you choose to come out, it's a brave choice. Good luck.
What I've been generally using recently (person 13 today), is something along the lines of "There's something i feel I need to share with you because - insert whatever specifici reason here - , and i'm not uncomfortable about telling you as much as not having told you sooner - basically I'm gay" - so far people have no issue with it, some will ask things like "so how long have you known", or "I really don't know what to say but I don't have any problem with it and I"m happy you're at a point where you can say it". Fist few times I tried all sorts of contrived ways to bring up the topic and when it comes down to it, if these are people you've known for a while, whom you consider good friends or family, just say it, and possibly be ready to answer a few questions (not to justify your announcement as much as let them more into your process/evolution/etc...). Depends for everyone, but typically it's best to start slow, and where possible start with a few people you are fairly sure won't have any problems with it, because feeling like friends/family "are on your side"/spporting you is the best motivation to tell more people. I still have a few people on my list of "I care about these people and I wouldn't want them to find out third hand" but after they've been informed I don't think I'm gonna care much who knows or who tells etc... Obviously different for everyone, and I hope it goes as well as possible for you.
I don't have much experience with coming out yet as I have only just begun myself. It seems to me that each situation is going to be unique and require a different approach. Please let us know how it goes.
You should look up on YouTube the coming out video Mallow610 did when he came out to his mom. It's emotional and wonderful. I hope to come out to my extended family this coming week, and I'll be watching Mallow610's video a couple times for encouragement.
