over the past week, my boyfriend randomly told my best friend/sister that I'm transgender. apparently she flipped out, and she refuses to have a normal conversation with me anymore. i get she's kinda flipping out about the secret and the initial shock of it (especially considering the fact up until about 6 months ago i was doing everything to hide the fact, mostly to convince myself that my head was just playing tricks on me. i literally had long hair and wore pink skirt daily, nothing was more awkward and made me hate myself more than that.) asdfghjkl; i hate giving people time, but i'm guessing it's probably best that we don't talk about it for a week or so then she can start asking questions. or whenever she's ready. chances are she's going to stop talking to me though :/ she's not very tolerant of the LGBT group because her parents have convinced her it's 'wrong.' great. :bang:
You're right to give her some time, but don't let it sit too long. I'd say give her a few days, and then contact her on facebook/SMS and ask her to talk to you. I would make it undemanding, just tell her you value her friendship and want to talk about things. Tell her you want her to ask any questions she needs to ask. What she asks might be hurtful, but you've got to let her let those feelings out, otherwise they'll just poison anything between you. I suspect the #1 thing that's bothering her is a worry that you've secretly been sexually fantasizing about her all this time. When most straight/biological-gender identifying people learn a close friend is gay/bi/trans, the most uncomfortable thought is the idea of someone of the same gender fantasizing about them. You've got to do your best to assure her that you view her the same way she views you.
I've already had a similar conversation with her about my sex interests. She clearly knows that I have no interest in her and she knows I'd rather die then have to deal with fantasies about her. What bugs me is that my boyfriend told her on Sunday, and she didn't tell me he told her until about 3 hours ago ._. she's honestly being her overly complicated self, and I texted her asking her if there was anything she wanted to know, she told me a few minutes ago that it didn't matter but she didn't want to see me at all until we get done with our break. ._.
