My mom..

so your mon does want other people finding out your gay wow

 

Hey - Prep x Core...don't worry.:icon_bigg

It's always good to vent!(*hug*)

 

wow holy shit sounds just like my mom except my mom doesent know i'm bi

 

Venting is fun. I've done it on more than one occasion, now. In fact, many of the posts here seem to be people just venting. It does feel good to just let it all out, though.


My sister often acts like that, except for different reasons. She starts getting all frustrated at my younger brother and I if we start doing something that displeases her (aka. acting immature in any way), because, as far as we can tell, "someone whome she's never met might look down on us" or something. Yah, I agree with you that it can be annoying when people get embarrased for you, expecially when you don't care and you're surrounded be complete strangers.

 

Hi Prep x Core,

Sounds like your mom just isn't ready with all of the right answers if someone approaches her about her gay son. Maybe your parents still think the "illness" will somehow disappear. Slowly but surely, they will get the picture. You just have to keep convincing them step by step. Sure is hard to raise decent parents these days . By the way, Boy Meets Boy (David Levithan) is a great book:eusa_clap . I also bought the audio version and have listened to it 4 or 5 times. Actually you're being treated like the character "Tony" in the book. Eventually Tony's parents wisen up. Hey, why not insist that your mom read the book before she messes with your next boyfriend.

Lorenz

 

Hey there... wow, this is too bad. Im sure in time she'll get better about it. I think that parents have to come out too, I hope at least. My mom knows, but my dad doesnt... and I thought she'd want to tell everyone and be all proud... like Justin's mom of Queer as Folk (yes, i cried when it was over )

But she was very "keep your head down and its fine" ... maybe she'll get better when Im out to the world... as in university.

Dont get me wrong, shes been great, i just thought she'd be so proud id have to keep her quiet...

 

It sounds like your mom's still sort of in denial. *sigh* Coming out to parents is amazingly difficult- the aftermath shouldn't have to be worse.

Personally, I would drag her into my room, lock the door, and say, "I'm gay. It's not going to change. If you have some problem with that, try and keep it to yourself!"

Of course, I have know idea if that would make any positive difference :icon_wink Still, hammering the point into her brain might get her to get over her denial.

Good luck, and here's to hoping things get better.

 

im jealous.. my moms great about it.. but i get a feeling shes still hiding something.. we watch all those shows together... but we never talk about hot guys... I think that this is more MY problem, because I guess Im a little insecure still. No matter how proud I am, il still feel a tad like im letting her down.. for having to deal with it.

 

Yeah, well no parent wants their child to be gay (unless you're Laura from Project Runway ) if only because they don't want their child to be hurt because of their differece. And it's really for that reason that we feel guilty that we're letting our parents down. I guess society's really to blame here...

And congratulations Prep_x_core on your recent breakthrough with your mom!! That feels pretty good knowing that someone you love fully accepts you for who you are.

 

yeah.. i couldnt agree more, suburbs.

 

I'm sorry- gotta add this.

David Levithan is one of the best authors ever. I love all his work. I'd reccomend "The Realm of Possibility" and "Wide Awake." Another great book is "Heterophobia" by Ragan Fox- but that's poetry.

I'm glad things started to clear up for you. My mom really tries- bless her heart- but I think it's really hard for her to accept it too. So sure, your mother worries about you getting the crap beat out of you. Mine does too. But then again I'm usually decked out in rainbows of some form...

 

Ahh.. the rainbow...
A subject of controversy for me...

I like that we have a symbol.. Im not sure if I'm glad its something that can be used innocently to mean nothing more than a rainbow, though. It can get confusing.

But I inderstand why it is what it is.. Diversity. And that all makes sense. So now my only issue is, How comfortable am I with it. Do I really think that we should plaster it all over out houses, bodies, and bumpers? I'm not really sure.

Sure, its a great thing to have for Gay Pride parades and the such, but when the environment is the real world, everyday life, should we really be promoting ourselves as "different"? Straight people dont put flags on their lawns... Nor people of another race... I thought we were fighting for equality, not to be recognized as an accepted, separate society.

For example, I live in a small town.. "in the country". There is a local fish & chip joint.. run by a very butchy lesbian. She's proud, and quite typical. She has a 6 inch tattoo of the flag, with "Pride" under it, on her calf. On the roof of her joint, she has a pride flag.

What's the point? Do we care that she's a lesbian? As my mom said, "Does she hate straight people?" The same question is raised about Bed & Breakfasts. A local B&B is run by a lesbian couple, and they have a Canada flag, Nova Scotia flag, and Pride flag on their lawn. Do they only want gay travelers?

Now, I know the answer to that question is no, they're just identifying themselves as gay. "Gay safe"--even. But another local B&B uses a simple period on their list of links to awknokedge that there is a link. When clicked on, it reveals their listing on a gay travel website. A simple solution to the "gay friendly" identification problem. We're smart, lol if we want gay B&B hosts, we know how to search for them.

Promotion is unnecessary. Thats my problem. Like most things, it has a time and a place, but sometimes, its just not appropriate.


(Whoa, RANT!!!!! and no offense, BTW, its just how I feel. I dont hold anything against people do promote themselves with the pride symbol.)
Just needed to get that out.

 

That was definitely more than a rant; that was a well written, coherent essay. And I agree with you, gay people probably shoudn't be promoting themselves as an accepted separate society in the ideal world.

However, I think at this time it might even be for the better that some people do exhibit their pride, because, in a world that is filled with homophobes, the gay community needs to find a way to tell the children of North America, and the world, that being gay is acceptable and one can be proud of being gay, despite large amounts of criticism and hate from others.

Although, I may be wrong on this and the time has already come in Canada where gay pride and promotion are not necessary to the social progression of society, because, at least in my perspective, Canada has, for the most part, been about 10 years ahead of the United States socially. America may be able to turn Canada into a wasteland hundreds of times over, but Canada knows how to structure a society.

Sorry, this has deteriorated into one of my pro-Canada/anti-BushAmerica rants, but really any chance to talk about how much better Canada is than Bush's America is too good to pass up.

 

yay! GO CANADA! even if we have a dumbdumb Prime Minister.. (hide from his laser creepy eyes. they'll get you!!)

hahaha

but yeah, it's nice to see we all agree? So yeah.. i guess my official position is that Im fine with it.. in the right place.

Im sure, when Im out, I'll have some sort of rainbow in my possession. :icon_smil

 

Ouch, my over-stated pride.

I did type out a big long ranty back to you, but seeing as that would be immature, I think I'm going to quote prep..."I'm out, I'm proud, there's nothing you can do about it."

I do, however, feel that the attack was unnessacary. But whatever, forgive and forget.