i just started coming out after my 16th birthday (December 9th)and i was wondering if it would be realistic to be out by the new year so i could start to date same sex people. or is that too fast? i reposted this in advice because it is mor about advice than the season
There's no set time period for coming out. I don't think you should come out just because you want to date someone right away. There's no rush and you should do it when you are comfortable doing it. Good luck!
I've gotten to the point where i don't give a s**t what people think about me and just wanna be free of all the lies. i'm ready to be out but should i take it slow? Or just go for it?
Do what ever most you're most comfortable with, If you think you can just come out and say you're gay and be OK with it then by all means do it but just remember there is no rush and just do it whenever it seems right to you.
only you can accurately gauge your readiness and the most likely reactions of the people around you to know how slow or fast you should take things. you say that you're ready and don't give a damn what others think. i'm the same. but my advice to you is to keep in mind that coming out of the closet will effect more than just you and once it's done there's no going back. just make sure that you really, really think through everything that is involved in being out of the closet. once you have and you feel yourself completely ready, i say go for it. just don't try to force things to go too quickly just to meet a deadline. there are 365 days in 2013, you know. no real reason to be out entirely by Jan 1st vs Jan 14th etc.
You're header is a question you should really be asking yourself. If you feel ready and think that it's right to come out that quickly, and you're comfortable with that pacing, then absolutely it's realistic. It all depends on you and what you feel is right. I know in my own life, I really started coming out in late September/Early October, and decided I wanted to be completely out by July 2013. Here we are coming up on the end of December, and I'm just about completely out, and will be by January 1st. Like others have said before me, I don't think you should rush yourself to come out that quickly just because you want to date. You need to be ready to face any potential fallout you might come across on the way. Hopefully everybody in your life will be supportive and just happy for you. I sincerely hope that. But it's best to be at least somewhat prepared for the possibility that this won't always be the case, and sometimes when we rush through something like this, we don't prepare for that and when and if it does hit, it hits really hard. Bottom line, only you can really gauge what's right for you. Coming out is a little different for every individual, and nobody can tell you what's right for you, or what a realistic goal is. Just don't be as concerned about a specific date like January 1st. If it takes you into January, or even February, you still have just about the entire year ahead of you. Regardless of what route you take, I wish you nothing but the best and hope that your experiences are positive
Ask yourself. I'd be careful about getting a spontaneous burst of confidence and then telling everyone. You might not care about people's opinions one day, but the following you may. I would sleep on it and then decide .
