I need to know, because I can't take this any longer. See, i'm bisexual. It's something that isn't easy for me to accept because 1) I lean more toward woman and so its easier for me to try to hide under that attraction via the gay label and 2) the biphobia, which is, I must say, the most significant considering is pretty much fuels #1. Now, i know, what people is rubbish and I should just focus on what I feel and what I want out of life. I should just ignore all those painful whispers and outright bigotry and get on with my life. Its true, i should. But I can't. I can't rid myself of the shame, the shame I know is wrong to have, but that grows nonetheless. If i think of it for too long, I feel like my skin is crawling. I feel like a whore. Despite being a virgin who has only kissed to guys. Despite knowing my conscious would torture me if I ever even thought about cheating on anyone. I KNOW I'm not a whore, but I can't stop feeling like one. I even feel ashamed for admitting i'm ashamed. How insane is that? But what really scares me to no end, is the thought of trying to hit on girls - because, lets face it, i'm mostly interested in women -and getting told to my face that i'm a fence sitter, greedy, and vindictive. That i'll get rejected because of something that is beyond my control. That i'll feel the brunt of ugly looks and hurtful remarks upon coming out. I know I need to work on self-acceptance. And I am and will continue to do so. but I need to know - because there is a good chance that i'm overestimating things -how bad is biphobia, both in the gay community and out? I want to know what i'm up against, honestly and it would comfort me to know. Thank you, EC. You are the greatest :icon_bigg
i wouldn't really know but i think bisexuals get hate from other people because some eople think if you're bisexual , your going to cheat or your just secretly gay or lesbian , that you just won't admit it my dad believes your either one way or another , that there is no such thing as bisexual and that's not true. for me....i think i could be bisexual and i'm so scared to hit on girls because i don't want to be wrong and turn out straight. i don't want to break a girls heart and have her think i used her.. i want to flirt with girls but i'm too scared. i know it's hard for you to accept yourself , it's not easy ...but in time hopefully..it will goodluck , sorry if i didn't really help
I think that there is a sizable bit of biphobia out there (look at the Dan Savage thread thats currently going on for some arguments). I think the most important aspect is which specific community you're asking, and in some places biphobia might not even exist.
Wounds, I do have to disagree with you that bisexuals get the most hate from society. As a person who has always pretended to be a straight male, my friends were always very intrigued by bisexual women. To me, it seems like two girls fooling around with eachother is much more accepted than two guys. Laila, if you feel that you are going to face bigotry from the straight female population, which is what i assume, then those girls are just bitches. i know you've probably heard this many times before, but worrying about what those type of girls think is pointless. I would try to figure out if you're actually bisexual though. I still think I may be bisexual because when hooking up with women, I can still get aroused. However, sometimes I think I am just attracted to the attention and intimacy I get from a woman. And I also sometimes think that I want to be attracted to women so much that the simple idea of being with one is arousing. It is hard to differentiate and very confusing and I am still on my journey to figure that out. Best of luck to you though, and I truly think not many people will care if your bisexual. All my straight friends think its sexy.
Actually, I'm more worried about the gay community. And, maybe in wrong, but I don't think people assuming you'll have a threesome, ect is really accepting the person. It seems to me to be part of the 'whorish' stigma. Maybe I'm just being oversensitive tho
Only if there's a penis in there somewhere. Which brings us back to that clueless (and hurtful) assumption that bi people have a "straight" and "gay" sex drives running in parallel straight into wanton depravity and a status of a living sex toy. Fact is, this is no more (and no less) common among bi people than among anyone else. It's sort of super-charged version of gay guys & anal intercourse. Yes, various kinds of nonmonogamy are more frankly discussed among bi people, and probably, more of them tried it with more than one partner, but it doesn't mean that it's something everyone likes or that they would like to do it with a straight guy who thinks it's anything like the way it's presented in porn.
look , everyone gets hate , i never said that bisexuals get the most hate ..that was never typed , i said bisexual get hate. ---------- Post added 27th Dec 2012 at 12:37 PM ---------- i just fucking realized , my gender is male instead of female...i need to start paying attention more when i'm re-registering
OK, I'll say it. You WILL get a lot of hate from the gay community. I can't speak for the lesbian-on-bisexual-women hate, since I have zero experience with that. But there's a ton of hatred towards bisexual men from gay men. I know plenty of gay men who won't date bisexuals, and won't even befriend them. I've only half-jokingly said that bisexuals are stuck in a lose-lose-lose scenario. * You settle down with someone of the opposite sex? That proves that one can't trust a bisexual - they'll always choose "normalcy" in the end. * You settle down with someone of the same sex? That proves that you weren't bisexual at all - you were gay, and just scared to admit it. * You don't settle down? That proves that bisexuals are afraid to commit. And even when presented with this argument, these gay guys simply agree with all three scenarios, and state that's the reason they never get involved with bisexuals, ever. To me, it seems ridiculous. Might a bisexual guy leave me for a woman? Sure. And a gay guy might leave me for a taller, or handsomer, or better-in-bed guy. I honestly don't see any difference. Lex
