Tonight I was with a group of friends. People whom I consider pretty open minded about politics, religion, lgbt issues. During the night out there were at least 4 times when comments were made about gays. (started because a new co worker of a friend is gay). They called him a queen, joked about his partner, about how stereotypically gay he is. And I'm thinking -- how the hell would I come out to these people? They've been in my life forever it seems. I have no doubt they'd accept me as gay. Maybe I'm just more sensitive now to this stuff, maybe its really no big deal. But it made me think twice -- they'd probably say its cool, be ok with it, wish me luck. And when I'm not around, would I be made fun of? Weird -- it sucks. I didn't expect this.
Sorry for this short reply, im currently busy. But i just wanted to say that coming out to people like them might be tough, but it would break down their stereotypical views of gay people. If you're not ok with the way they talk, show them by example how they're clearly wrong about all of their stereotypes and come out to them when the time is right.
Well, I think it is given that when a person is not around they are going to be talked about and it doesn't matter whether they're a good or bad person; if they are brought up in conversation they are going to be talked about. And being talked about can have both pros and cons. But when it comes to your friends here- from the information you've given about them- I think that the only thing that is important is that they will accept you and be cool with it when and if you come out to them. I think it's just a fact of life that people talk about other people, so it can be a pretty big possibility that they will talk about you and you now know how they would normally react and say when talking about a gay person. It could actually be different though- because it sounded like they didn't really know the person being talked about personally, but they sound like they are good friends to you. Just that in general could completely cause them to change or at least think about their actions and what they say before they speak it. And even if that doesn't happen they still wouldn't probably talk about you right in front of you, so it is sort of that whole "what you don't know can't hurt you" philosophy, which definitely has a lot of mixed feelings and interpretations by different people, so I have no right to tell you whether that is a right way or a wrong way to look at situations.
