How do you deal with loneliness?

I deal with it by trying to stay optimistic, and by dreaming of the day when I'm not alone. It might not be next week, it might not be next month. But someday I'll meet someone. And for me, that makes it okay.

(*hug*)

 

I admire your ability to stay optimistic! It can be so difficult

 

Yes, it can be difficult. But the alternative is depression, and I've been there. Not going back if I can help it.

There should be special clubs / bars for us shy quiet types, away from the overbearing confident types. Maybe we'd stand a better chance lol.

 

I see what you are feeling. I get like that, often. I have trouble being optimistic because I've never really had anything worthwhile. It's not like I'm just going through a dry spell - I haven't even made it to the well yet!

But I guess the best way to deal with it is to just let it go. I work, I go to school, and I talk with friends. There's no one eligible to date in my area, so I can't really worry about it that much.

 

Being lonely does suck :/ but i havent quiet found my special someone either so lets stay optimistic

 

I've been single for 9 years. Not even had so much as a one night stand (not into those), so I know exactly how you feel. That weird tightening in your chest every time you see someone else in love. The empty space in the bed when you go to sleep... And when you wake up.

We'll have our turn though. Of that I'm certain.

 

I hope I'm right lol.

One thing I realised, which helped drag me out of a fog of depression which damn near killed me, was that no-one is attracted to misery. So now I do my best to enjoy life. Since coming out to my closest friends I have a social life for the first time in years. Sure, I still have days where I feel like shit, and end up crying myself to sleep, but they are becoming less frequent.

If all else fails I could always become a monk...

 

The only way to survive is to build a life full of things YOU like to do -- sports, gym, classes, hiking, book or movie club, volunteering, your church, or whatever it is.

Which is, BTW, also the way you'll either meet people who will know people you could date or you'll meet them directly!

Depression is an awful thing -- you'll beat it, at least in part, by setting goals for doing things.... like going to at least 1 lgbt meeting next week, or walking a mile 3 days next week (or whatever)....

keep posting

 

I deal with it by getting my butt outside and riding a bike, You get to meet all kinds of people, who knows you may even find a friend

 

Most conversations start with a simple word - hello. Or a variation thereof.
Or a compliment - "nice tee-shirt".
Or even a casual moan - "I wish the rain would stop".

Try it, and see where it leads! Chances are nothing will come of it, beyond a 2-minute conversation with a stranger. But you never know, you might just start something more. I met one of my best friends at a bus-stop, and although. Can't remember that first conversation, it probably started awkwardly...

 

Simple,... just make a comment about the weather, or ask a question pertaining to their activity. Small talk is easy,.. once that is established you can move on to more serious things.

 

Same as above. Except I already set my eyes on someone+I suggest listening to music you like or which make you feel relaxed (Don't listen to All By Myself >.>). And watch movies which help you feel better about yourself as a person. I'm not talking of porn :***:, but films like Dolphin Tale etc.

 

Hi,

I am guessing that in addition to being gay you have social anxiety. You want to start that conversation but just cannot bring yourself to take the risk.

I believe (just my lone opinion) there is sometimes links between sexual preference and Aspergers in some individuals.

There are online tests you can take.

I am not saying you have Aspergers but it is something to explore. Knowing is half the battle.

Not knowing how to or wanting to risk a conversation at age 25 is a clue.

Just trying to give you options, nothing more.

Stuck

---------- Post added 3rd Jan 2013 at 12:47 PM ----------

Hi,

What is it the Buddhists say...

Getting the correct answers is not as important as asking the correct questions.

Is it loneliness or something else putting you in a lone position?

Stuck

 

by continuing to do what you are doing now helps building up confidence we all get lonely even with a good circle of friends everyone experiences loneliness at some point . I meet new people in my job most days and sometimes just a smile breaks the ice it always gets a response your not the only person who feels like this its more common than you think .

 

I'm not a guy, but I have the same problem. Nobody seems interested, apart from sex. And it also kills me inside. I often cry myself to sleep because of it. I hate my appearance and lack of confidence. Doesn't help that I'm overweight and have short hair, which puts most men off. So yeah, you're definitely not alone