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Too scared to even think like this.

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Xeroxn, Jan 3, 2013.

  1. Xeroxn

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    So i've known that I am bisexual for as long as I can remember. But I am too scared to even think about having anything more than a kiss with a guy. It's just....i am so scared and I don't know why.
     
  2. Lance

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    What exactly scares you about it? Family, religious beliefs, society "norms?"
     
  3. Xeroxn

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    I think society "norms" and family. Because to them I am completely straight and so I have been putting on this like mask to hide that I like guys too and it's gotten to the point that like when I even just look at a guy and think he's attractive I get scared that I will actually start to like him and try and attempt to date him.
     
  4. Lance

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    Do you feel your family wouldn't be accepting if you were gay/bisexual?
     
  5. Hard Candy

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    Dude, I can totally relate. That's why I cannot even go out with a guy if if I want to.
     
  6. The Escapist

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    (*hug*)

    It's okay to like guys too.
     
  7. alberz

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    I think I know what you mean. Everyone (family and friends) assumes you’re straight by default, and when you have relationships with girls, talk about girls you like, about wishes for a family, etc., it sort of cements their view that you’re 100% straight. All of that, for me, is true, but it’s only part of who I am. The other part, though, is hidden, and truth is important to me, so I don’t like hiding it.

    Do you know any openly gay or bi people in real life? I don’t, so when I’m attracted to guys, I feel really alone. That’s why I came to this site. I almost feel like I don’t want to discuss girls/relationships at all, because it adds to the weight of the straight norm, and marks me as straight in the eyes of anyone who’s in the closet too (at least, that’s what it does to me when other guys do it).

    Having said all that, I’m afraid to come out when nobody in my social group is openly gay/bi. There are a few acquaintances who might be in the closet (based on the way they act when they’re drinking), but none who are out (I don’t know that many people in my current city). I also worry that being openly bi will scare away girls, since they might think I’m really gay.

    I find it much easier to be open on this site than in real life. I know there are people feeling the same things, so I don’t feel so alone when I think about being bi. I hope being here helps you too. (*hug*)
     
  8. VyreRain

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    Ummm well at least your not completely gay.... being gay sucks, you never meet any guys that are decent and if you do your forced by society to pretend to be straight most of your life to meet everyone else's goals for your life
     
  9. Lance

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    That's untrue and not very necessary/helpful.
     
  10. leer

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  11. VyreRain

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    @leer I'm sorry .., @Lance your right I apologize .... just a lil stressed out yesterday...
     
  12. Lewis

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    You're not the only one, think we all feel like that at some point. I mean I've only ever kissed or done anything else with a guy when I've been drunk. Even though I accept that I'm gay, I still feel a little guilty and scared. Probably due to the fact that I'm scared people will find out...
     
  13. VyreRain

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    @Lewissss to make matters worse I have homophobi. Parents and ive been having migranes and I got a script for lira tab from a friend and it makes the pain slightly better.... soo in a manor of speaking I'm stressed out.
     
  14. Xeroxn

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    Thanks for all the replies no there isn't anyone who i know at least is openly gay there is this girl i'm good friends woth that is bi but she can't keep her mouth shut and then idk I just feel that I can't come out my parents WILL NOT accept it they think its not normal and gross but when it comes to other people they're all like "you like who ya like." Anyway I think basically that I should wait till I truly accept myself for who I am before I go telling people, I mean after all I am only 16. Anyway I just wanted to say thanks for the support and advice means a lot to this troubled teenager.
     
  15. VyreRain

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    @Xeroxn If you need any advice :slight_smile: that I can help with lemme know .... which means if you need to build a bike generator or.. write a story or poem I'm your guy but socially ... nope lol Im no good :slight_smile: lol oh and if you need help orchestrating a musical I'm still your guy but sadly no help much of anywhere else.... :slight_smile:
     
  16. typicalguy1

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    I have the same issue as yours. And always try to act like a straight. Somehow it's considered as stupid and frustrating, but can't help it. It turned out not to be okay not only girl but also boy. Kinda complicated :slight_smile:\