I am completely infatuated with a girl from school. She is only a couple months younger, but is a grade below me(I'm a junior, she's a sophomore). I met her last year when she was in my advanced math class. This year I have half of my classes with her I sit next to her in my classes and talk to her, but haven't got up the nerve to talk to her much outside of school. I know she isn't homophobic because she has a brother who is gay or bi (he's still questioning, he's only 13) and she is in GSA with me Her family however is homophobic and caused her brother to attempt suicide multiple times and put him in a nuthouse for a year. I look forward to seeing her everyday. She is smart, beautiful, super nice, althletic, and adorably goofy. She is just absolutely perfect in my eyes. Unfortunately I am nearly 100% sure she is straight. She has a crush on a guy (although no one will tell me who) and has not responded any time I've complimented or been slightly flirtatious with her. She may know I like her because one of my friends said his bi friend likes her and I am pretty openly bi at school. I just keep holding out hope that I can "pull her out of the closet" or some crap. I need advice. I want to be her friend if I can't date her because she is a great girl. Any advice on how to get closer to her or get over her?
at your age many crushes happen, and sometimes we think they are perfect for us and in reality years later we meet them and are happy we dodged a bullet. as soon as next crush happens this one will go away even if you want it to stay. always does. if it is real, she will respond. you have option if flirting does nothing to ask her to Sadie Hawkins dance.
Be her friend. I bet you know how to do that, so start from there because she sounds like a cool girl. But be careful - her parents might make life a living hell if they find out you are gay and hanging with their daughter, even worse if you convince her to make out with you. She has very good reason to be in the closet right now if she even has any feelings for girls, so even if she could be interested in you it may not be a likely scenario. On the other hand I have two friends who met in high school and both thought the other was straight, one had just broken up with a boyfriend. They were in the same grades as you two, the same situation with classes, and the younger girl sounded exactly like the girl you like. They had a secret fling that only a few friends knew about and helped them hide for the next two years because the school was pretty homophobic. After college they actually got married. They divorced after about 5 years, when the older one realized they were really a poor match for life, they had not dated around enough to be so serious, and they went the way of many high school romances but are still friendly. There was a huge amount of guilt on the older one for a few years for leaving, but they were just not made for forever. So I don't want to fill your head with dreams, but just saying. If she's straight, it will do you no good to spend all your time obsessing about her. But if you become her friend, you can certainly find out for sure what she thinks about it, and as long as you still want to be friends even if you find out she is really straight or really closeted and not ready for more than friends, it should be ok. But keep your eye on other potential girls in school, so you don't get too hung up on this one, because it doesn't sound like she's ready or possibly interested for this to work out. But she might make a really nice friend.
thanks, helpful advice about keeping my eye out for other people too. I hope I can get her to be friends with me. Both of us are on the socially awkward side and she has a best friend who she is really close to so it's hard for me to get to hangout with her...also as soon as I got the guts(and excuse) to get her phone number she broke her phone...literally the next day -_- but thanks.
