Hi, my girlfriend was away for a few days and just came home today. I have been so stressed out about my sexuality, it has been about 6 months of constant obsession. She knows of curiosities about other men and has known for a year. I was finally able to really accept that I have to be totally honest, and spill my guts to her. I have been grieving, it means all our dreams probably won't come true..together. we probably won't get married, and I won't be able to marry any woman. We won't have children together, and the list of pain goes on! She came home with Christmas presents for me, from her fam. They love me, I care about them also. I don't have a family. Also we have a trip planned to visit D.C VIA an Amtrak train. It was so good to see her, I'm glad she is home. I am so sad you guys, so sad. I don't have a plan of action, I dont have anyone to talk to. I am at a lost, I love her and would love to marry, have kids, the whole 9 but she has to know. I don't want to be with anyone else, man or woman but I know I will always a lust for the same sex. I can go without acting on it, but I can't deny her a person who is intensely aroused by her. How the Hell do you tell the woman you love, whom you've been with and shared so much, that you just don't think you fit sexually?? She is a beautiful girl, such a great person. I feel like Shit, OMG....
Hi, What if you could come down on one side of the fence or the other instead of straddling the fence? I am not a doctor but I can feel your pain. There is new research out there... Read this. Could a Brain Chemical Drive Male-Male Attraction? | Serotonin & Sexual Orientation | LiveScience This may mean that in the near future SSRI's (selective serotonin re uptake inhibitors) may come available to land you on one side of the fence or the other. It is not hopeless. Paxil and Prozac are existing SSRI's. I am not saying this is correct for everybody but may be warranted for those in pain like you. Something to think about. Stuck
i wish i could help you, localfwbguy, i really do. truth be told, i'm in a similar position but have decided to stay with my partner and be faithful to him. i'm not saying that you should stay with yours. i can't say one way or another as your situation is unique to you and your partner, but i hope that the two of you can work things out. stay strong! wishing you the best.
Hey CC, thanks for your note. Truth be told, I love her so much! I do not feel trapped in the relationship and do not want to be in a relationship with another. I told her today, I just felt she ought to know of my struggle. I feel she had the right to know, though it hurts! She doesn't want to keep me from discovering myself, but I know I love her. She wants to wait for me to figure myself out, but doesn't want to wait forever. I can't blame her, she loves me and I her. She is my soul mate, but I have an unwanted sexual pull towards men it seems. I wish it would go away.. I could never have with a man what i have with her been very sad lately
it's good that you told her as, like you said, she does deserve to know. it's great that she's willing to wait at least for a little while while you work things out, although how much time you'll need is impossible to know. :/ what do you think the chances are that she'd be alright with staying friends if you two do separate? perhaps you won't lose her entirely?
