Warning: This post will contain some graphic language. Please don't laugh at the stereotype or think I'm making this up, but I am a gay man whose best friend is a straight female who happens to be employed as a stylist. We go back about 15 years with each other and she has been the most fantastic friend I could ask for. She helped me accept myself in college, helped me come out to my very religious family (we live in the Deep South), and we've helped each other deal with men issues and make sure the other has a good boyfriend. Now, here's the problem. She's dating this new guy who we'll call John. John's work has him living about six hours away in the next state over from us. They only see each other like two weekends a month and Skype every night. Anyway, John has issues. He's a loud, arrogant, condescending prick. He acts like he's this rogue badass who kicks ass and takes names and is always mouthing off. Some of his Facebook posts should probably have the local authorities questioning him. But, my friend has a thing for bad boys (I never did) and tolerates him. He is also crazy jealous. He refers to me as his girlfriend's "little gay friend" (despite being over six feet tall and health conscious, go figure) and when we went to a gay party for Halloween, he lost it. He told her, and I quote since I saw the texts, "If (my name) lays a hand on you or even dances too close to you, I will rip his dick off and shove it up his ass." When my friend reminded him I'm gay, his response was, "How do you know? Have you fucking seen him sucking a dick?" The worst part is that on the weekends he is in visiting, we (my friend and I) have no contact. She'll tell me, "Oh, hey, it's John's weekend. I'll talk to you Monday." Maybe it's because I'm an enabler (have been my whole life) I put up with this and haven't confronted her or him, but as long as he isn't actually in my face or coming by my place or whatever, I don't feel outright threatened or in danger, and I tell myself this'll pass when she finally has enough and moves on from him. What do you guys think?
Hi, How can I say this nicely... Have you seen the news lately? It is full of bad acts being committed by idiots like your friend's boyfriend. And who is on the receiving end of these bad acts? It appears to me you are setting yourself up as a target for a nut job. If it is any comfort nobody who knows him will be surprised by what he did when they talk to the media. You and your friend are playing with dynamite in a minefield. Just my opinion. Stuck
