I am soooo close to telling my closest friend (my employee), but can't bring myself just to blurt it out. He brought our previous conversation back up today while we were at work alone. He said hey what is it that you wanted to tell me. I said you will find out in due time. He kept asking work related questions and I said it doesn't really have anything to do with work, so then the questions came up: does it have to do with my girlfriend or when we plan to ever get married (he already said I am gonna be his best man) or hockey or the classic car I bought that used to be his, or if it had to do with my ex that was calling and harassing me today?!? I kept saying no, no, no and no with this nervous, shit eating grin on my face. He then did a recap and said ok it doesn't involve blah, blah, blah and I noticed myself getting a little nervous thinking he was gonna say, ok then are ya gay? That didn't happen but the thought of him saying it, kinda made me crazy. In my head as he was asking all the questions, I kept saying to myself, c'mon just ask me and then I got panicky if he did. DAMN YOU FLIP FLOPPING BRAIN - LOL!! Then there is this whole, ok what if he does ask me and I say yes I am. Then what? Is this the right place to just say it and leave it at that since my other employees would be coming back? How would we bring the subject matter up again to give him a little more in-depth explanation? Funny thing is, although he has no idea and this would be a shock, I envision it going very smoothly and he would be like ok and then move on to another subject. Anyone got any support to push me over the hump? I just got it in my head with in the past week and a half, that I am ready to unleash my lie/secret and am super anxious to tell at least one person. I want someone to know. UGH!!! :bang:
Hey, No ugh, you are doing fine. Let nature takes its course don't push it if you are not ready. Telling your gf which people expect you to marry... That will be a much harder nut to crack. Baby steps. Stuck
I think you're doing fine. No one needs to push you - you will decide when the time is right. My only piece of advice is this: If you're sharing this with him as your friend - then do it in a friend setting - your house/ a bar whatever. Doing it at the workplace makes it seem like you will be telling all of your employees. And maybe you will be but it seems to me that you want him to be 1st as your friend.
