So.. here it goes, All of my life (since I was 15) I have considered myself straight with some gay tendencies. Ever since puberty I always had a strong attraction to women, but as I got older the thought of men started entering my mental and visual scope but only in a sexual fantasy type roll. Eventually I had become infatuated with gay sex and decided to act upon those feelings, and I did enjoy it, but almost immediately after the act I felt disturbed and bothered and decided that men weren't for me.That feeling would typically last for a few months and then the urge for male contact would sneak back into my mind. And so I lived happily with this up until I was 28, I had remained single for quite sometime satisfying which ever desire arose at the time. Until I met this girl, now normally I would meet a woman hook up with her and no longer have an interest in her, but this one was different I had to be with her and stay with her. But now it feels as though my sexual desire for men is much stronger than my desire for her. Sometimes I get an erection amd lose it very quickly when I am with her. My thoughts of sex are no longer full of women it is all men in my sexual desires. Here is my issue, I am not emotionally attracted to men, actually I am not attracted to men per se but I am attracted to their plumbing very much. I love my girlfriend but I am no longer really interested in having sex with her. When we do have sex I am usually never as firm with her as I am when I am with man. Again though I don't think I want a relationship with a man. I am just totally lost and longer able to think clearly any more.. Now I starting to think I may be gay but tottaly still in love with my gf with very little sexual attraction to her. Sorry if this is hard to follow.. I just started writing with no real structure, I just let my thought regurgitate. Any adive or similar stories would help alot.
This may be interesting for you to read. Men who have sex with men - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia I think you're not gay, though. If there's not emotional attraction, but just sex, you are not gay. Just my opinion. P.S. That doesn't apply for one-night stands.
Hi thanks.. I breezed through that link briefly. I guess what bothers me the most is that it seems as though my attraction to men is ever evolving and getting stronger, if I were still single or much younger I don't think I would really have an issue with this dilemma. But now I am concerned with why is this happening now as I enter my thirties. If these feeling are true I would like to believe I would accept the new me. But then I start believing maybe I am just yerning for this because I cannot have it.
That's not weird at all. Don't worry, a lot of people discover they're not as straight as they think they are later in life. I know someone your age who told me he never had feelings for men until 2 or 3 years ago.
