that's the first step, right? admitting you have a problem? well i have a problem. and i need help. Im not happy with my body. I feel like its never good enough. im constantly comparing myself to other people. I'm thin, but when i see other people that i are really skinny and i want to gain weight. I see how bony they look, and i dont want to look like that. My chest is kinda small, and i just feel like there are a few areas that i could gain some weight and look a little better. however there are sometimes when i see other people trying to loose weight, and i appreciate my flat stomach and long, thin, legs. Im constantly fluctuating between skipping meals, and eating all the time and constantly excersizing... ugh, i wish i could just be happy with myself! I dont know if this counts as an eating disorder or what, but i know its not healthy.
There's no way to know that if you gain weight you will gain it in "the right areas." Take it from me, it's not worth trying to gain weight. I worked really hard to make myself gain 15 lbs. Instead of gaining weight in my boobs and butt I gained weight in my thighs and stomach. It really wasn't worth it. Now I'm trying to loose the weight, but it's a lot harder to loose it than it was to gain it. Although, I'm now in the "healthy" weight range instead of underweight. Anyways, my advice is to work on loving your body the way it looks now
Is that you in your avatar? You look really pretty And I understand where you are coming from. I can't help but compare myself to others as well. But what you need to do is realize just how amazing you are! Forget about how others look and what they have and look at yourself! Your gorgeous! Look in the mirror and point out to yourself every thing that you like about yourself - don't compare, its just you! Really make an effort to point out the wonderful things about you - everyone has wonderful traits! You need to realize just how great you are! You just don't see it! Sure, that person may have that, and another, another thing, but you have things they dont have. The most beautiful people are the ones who are themselves. Let yourself shine! Because we all deserve to.
Hi lexi, I can definitely understand where you're coming from with the body image concerns. They suck. I have a history of eating disorders, so I know how painful this kind of stuff can be. Hugs for you (*hug*) One of the things I find most helpful is to not think of my body as just "that piece of meat I use to look pretty." Whenever I have flare-ups of body negativity, I remind myself of all the awesome stuff my body lets me do. I can walk. I can laugh. I have arms to hold or comfort someone. I have legs to run and dance with. I can breathe. I can sing. I can see and hear the world. I put my hand over my heart to feel the beat, and I try to remember that I'm only alive because of my body. I don't want to make any ableist assumptions about your body, but let it suffice to say that I think we humans (especially those of us living in Westernized countries) tend not to take a very holistic view of the things our bodies do for us. Anything beautiful, pleasing, or joyful that I've experienced has only been because of this body of mine. This is far from a panacea for body image concerns, but whenever you start to have those "ugh" moments about your body, think back to these functions. The other thing I would recommend is that you talk to a counselor, preferably one specifically trained to work with people who have body image/eating disorders. They can help you break through these negative thoughts directed at your body and help you deal with better coping behaviors than skipping meals, excessive exercise, binging, and the like. I don't know enough about you to say for certain whether you can be diagnosed with a full-blown eating disorder, but when your thoughts about eating relate only to how it will influence your weight or shape (whether to make yourself gain or lose), that warrants intervention. The highest rates of recovery from EDs are in those who have caught it early, so if you can nip this in the bud before you meet the clinical criteria, then all the better. You deserve peace. (*hug*) Be kind and compassionate to yourself and your body. I won't pretend that throwing off this toxic mindset is easy. It can really be a lifelong struggle, I think. But it's still a really worthwhile thing to do.
Hey Lexi, (*hug*) good of you for asking. As a teenager it's natural to feel odd in your own skin but you'll find that those feelings change to liking or disliking your body all the time. Just roll with it and make sure you eat 3 meals a day but not to much and just realize that your body is still changing. It's not a eating disorder yet but keep in mind that it could turn into one if you don't watch out. My friend recently has been feeling this way and she came to me my advice to her was just cause you don't always feel like you look the best doesn't mean others view you that way. I told her honestly if she wasn't straight I'd date her in a heart beet. yes this sounds odd, no I was not joking or seemed like it. I'm an honest person and she knows this if I was any other way she wouldn't have come to me. She was looking for direct answers and that what I give.
First of all, comparing yourself to others isn't the way to go. Everybody's bodies are different and they hold weight differently. What you need to do is find a place where you are comfortable with yourself. Obviously that is easier said than done but it is possible. Do you have someone you can talk to about these feelings? If you ever just need to vent about feeling too thin or not thin enough or whatever, I can listen. It sucks to not feel comfortable with yourself but I can assure you that there is nothing wrong with you and I'm sure you are beautiful!
Yeah, that is really something that i need to work on... Thanks It helps to keep reminding myself that it will just go to my stomach, and that a lot of people wish they were as skinny as me thank you so much though, this really did help (*hug*) Oh, no i wish! That is the beautiful Natalie Portman Its nice to know that im not alone. Those are some good ideas, and i really appreciate it... you have no idea how much i appreciate it, so thank you (*hug*) This was REALLY, REALLY, REALLLLLLY helpful! I honestly would talk to a counselor if i could but 1) I dont think my parents would believe me... they think that I can ALWAYS think my way out of ANYTHING. They would probably just tell me that i know im skinny and there is no need to waste money on a counselor if i could just stop being to self concious. I dont think they would realize that its not something i can help. I'm trying, but i think a councelor would help, but i'll just settle for my journal *sigh* (nothing against my parents or anything..) 2)We dont really have money to spend on a counselor. But your post was honestly really helpful thank you soooooooo much (*hug*) Thank you! 3 meals a day will be alot, but im going to try! I ussually just eat lunch or dinner, sometimes both... i really need to work on that. thanks for the help, really (*hug*) Thank you so much- i dont really have anyone to talk to this stuff about... my mom says i can tell her anything, but like i said up there ^ she doesnt really understand. aw, thank you so much, i really appreciate it! (*hug*)
