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Little advice please?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Theagonist, Jan 16, 2013.

  1. Theagonist

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jan 7, 2013
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    Location:
    Missouri
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    All but family
    I'm (3 weeks from being) 16, and I know I'm gay, which I really only accepted last Fall, though I was "out" before then. I haven't ever dated a guy before, but I have dated a few girls before, but it's been near two years since I have, and I was defaintly emotionally attracted but not sexually at all. And now I really like my friend, she's really pretty and whatnot lol, we went to homecoming too. Idk why I like her since I really like guys, and I love the idea of having a boyfriend, but I really want to marry a woman - but since I have no sexual attraction to them that would fail. I really don't know what to do. Also I know she's straight but she told me she had feelings for this lesbian girl at our school - but she's drop dead gorgeous. Idk what to do >.>

    And also, she is really my only friend right now, and we littarly are the same person - like our past experinces are near the exact same, though they're bad things usaully (cutting, suicide attempts, etc)
     
  2. Crystine

    Crystine Guest

    Joined:
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    Location:
    Österreich (Austria)
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    hey you :slight_smile:

    you say that you find her "drop dead gorgeous" and you seem to have a lot in common... so why not ask her out? I don't really see a problem here :grin: if you like her, go with it... jesus, you're only 15 (okay, nearly 16, but still!)

    how do you even know that you can't get involved with a woman sexually? have you ever tried it out?
    sex is something very emotional and it really doesn't depend on gender - there are gays going "straight" for just one specific person, because they LOVE them!

    so if you like her and maybe want to give it a try, why not go for it? you're still very young and so is she (so about the lesbian crush thing; don't take it too seriously... girls like experimenting a lot more than most guys :wink: )

    also, sexuality is something very fluent for most people... you shouldn't let this opportunity pass just because you THINK you KNOW what you want... maybe you don't :wink:

    love and good luck,
    crystine
     
  3. Lexington

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 20, 2007
    Messages:
    11,409
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    Location:
    Colorado
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    It sounds like you know each other fairly well. In essence, you could read your post to her, and not really give her any information she didn't already have. If so, and you're intrigued by the idea of dating her, I'd say go ahead and date her. I WOULD put a caveat on that. Make it very clear where you stand.

    1. You still think you're gay, and the idea of sex with guys is really what gets you going.
    2. You want to ensure that you stay good friends. You don't want a romance or physical relationship to screw that up if things don't work out.

    Lex