Hi everyone, its been over a year since my las post here. Im still in the closet,but I think my mom suspects. Anyways this time I'm here because I need advice. When I started my senior year I had to take health1 and there were some freshmen, at that time I had a crush on a fellow senior, but then I saw this gorgeous boy looking at me, at the time I didn't think anything of it. It went like this for a few months and well I couldn't stop myself from developing a crush on him. The second semester I switched classes and I didn't had him in any of my classes. So the problem is that I would catch him looking at me in the hallways or in the lunch room. By the end of my senior year I was in love with him. I graduated and moved on with my life, I got a job and saved money and moved to Portland for college; although there were countless beautiful guys I couldn't stop myself from thinking about him. Things got kinda complicated in my family so I decided to come back to Alaska. There was a play last week and a friend of mine was performing so I went to my old high school, and guess what happened? Yup, he was there looking at me the same way he used to when I was in high school! I don't know what I should do, I've thinking about sending him a frien request on Facebook, but I'm not brave, or stupid enough lol. He is a sophomore righ now, very smart and an amazing athlete! Im not very confident, and I'm painfully shy! And also there's this girl who keeps asking me out, I'm afraid that people will know I'm gay since I'm almost 20, and I've never dated a girl! I'm not sure about this boys sexuality, but something tells me he is. Or maybe I just wanna believe that! So yeah, my life is a mess right now! What should I do? Please help! Thank you for reading and commenting guys :lol: btw sorry about my grammar, I still have issues with the english language! :icon_redf
hello. i can't tell you what you should do, but here's my opinion. i say go ahead and friend him on Facebook. i mean, it's just a friends request, right? it's not like you'd be asking him out and he could easily deny or ignore it if it bothers him. hell, maybe he'll even accept it and send you a message. who knows! i know the age gap of 4 years seems huge, but it's really not in my humble opinion. it seems so huge at your age because of the whole "sophomore + HS graduate" thing, but in the real world 4 years isn't that uncommon of an age difference for couples. hell, my partner is 4 years older than me. re: having never dated a girl and people becoming suspicious... who cares? i mean, it's your life and you're the one who will have to deal with the consequences of your actions, not anyone else. dating a girl when you really don't want too just to fill expectations will just be a pain and it wouldn't be fair to the girl, imho. so anyway, i say go for it! make first contact via a friends request! and good luck.
That isn't that big of an age difference in my opinion. You say he looks at you a lot. Did you talk to him much during school? It may make it less awkward messaging him later if you have a bit of a history to build conversation on.
Adding him is fine.... But he is 16. How are the laws in your state? I know that 16 is usually the age of consent..... But that doesn't mean crap. Just be careful.
Thanks for your advice everyone! I'm going to send him a friend request, and if he ignores it, at least I will be certain that he doesn't like me and I will stop making false hopes! Btw photoguy93 I'm in Alaska so I think the age of consent is 16
Age of consent aside.... 4 years is an eternity at his age. To put it in perspective, 4 years ago, he was 12. Today, at 16, 4 years is 1/4 of his entire lifetime. And a whole lot happens between 16 and 20. So even if the age of consent makes it legal, doesn't mean it's a wise idea. There's a huge power imbalance between those two ages, and it's not going to be healthy for him. Besides, unless you're really emotionally immature, I can't imagine a relationship working between a 16 year old and a 20 year old because the emotional differences are just too great. I know that's not what you want to hear but... I think you'll find it to be the case.
Friend request him. I would have to agree that the age difference is too big because he is 16 and when you're young it makes a lot of difference. I would make friends with him on facebook, if you have liked him for a long time it might be best to wait a little longer. Once he is 17, nearing 18 the age difference shouldn't matter so much. My girlfriend is 19 and I am 22.
In chinese zodiac pairings it has been considered to be a good match or perfect compatibility if the partner is either 4 years older or younger than you I think you should go with your feelings dude. Dont worry so much you capricorn/ virgo look a like. ( i just think ur either a capricorn or virgo hahaha!)
Totally agree. And you're probably only liking him because he's available. I've been there. It's a very big gap. he is not mature, and you are. I've changed a ton since I was 16.
Four years isn't much for adults, but he isn't an adult. Teenagers have different concepts of time and don't yet grasp the concept of consequences. That's not psychology so much as neuroscience. That part of their brain hasn't developed yet. Teenagers may seem mature and adult at times, but at key moments they're not. Trying not to make this sound insulting because there are a lot of teenagers on this site. Just saying how it is biologically. When in doubt, don't get involved with minors. If you have feelings for him, just avoid it completely. Your emotions may get the better of you and it's not worth going to jail.
Yes, it's kinda sad, but true. When I was 16 I thought I was bi, now at 20 I'm 100% positive I'm gay. I'm a patient guy, I'm not one to take huge risks, unless I have enough encouragement. He might think he's gay right now, and tomorrow he might turn out straight. So I'm just going to keep on waiting, I don't mind. I want my first one to be my only one. am a hopeless romantic, what ca I say! Lol ---------- Post added 19th Jan 2013 at 02:31 PM ---------- Hi, you were pretty close, I'm an acuarious. And I know the four years thing of the Chinese zodiac, I think is so cool. He's a buffalo and I'm a rooster, which are a perfect match. I love that kinda stuff, js :lol:
