my little sister is my best friend...and she's homophobic

Why are you not allowed to tell her? Do your parents know?

I was raised Catholic as well, which has made this whole process take much longer for me than it should have, IMO. Religious people aren't aware of what damage they do to non-heteronormative folks, I don't think - or they're aware and they don't care, pick one.

My little sister just turned 21 last year, so I think I'm feeling good about coming out at this point - the whole family is adults, out of the house, and can make their own decisions and draw their own conclusions. I've broached the subject with my parents (not relating to *me* being gay, but gay people in general, mentioning I have gay friends, etc) and the reaction has been universally negative. Perhaps once I tell them that I'm gay, things will change - but I'm not counting on it.

 

That must be really hard to have to worry about something like that :icon_sad: I feel for you.
I know I'm just saying something really useless here but I want to say that it's not hopeless - she's young now - she won't necessarily be homophobic forever. I can't act like that doesn't make it much less difficult and scary though.
I really hope everything ends up happy for you, and when she does know, eventually, she accepts you for it. Even if it takes a while. My friends' family is really really homophobic, but after 4 years, they managed to accept it. A friend also told me today - even if someone is extremely homophobic, they're more likely to accept it when they know and care about a person, unlike when they think of it as an abstract concept, or at least come to a compromise with their beliefs.
I'm sorry - I feel like I'm just saying meaningless encouraging things. I hope it will be okay (*hug*)

 

You can't keep it from her forever, hon. Also, I hope that your parents understand. Maybe they can help you...

 

maybe she'll realize that somebody she loves so much can't be a terrible person just because they're gay. if she doesn't know that there are gay people in her life then sure, it's easy to hate somebody you don't personally know. she's young enough still to expand her mind <3

 

This is kind of what I was going to say.

There is a strong chance that when you tell her that she will come to a realisation that it you're gay, then all this stuff she thought about gay people must not be true at all.

I've seen it time and time again: people are afraid of what they don't know, but they can be amazingly resilient and adept at changing their views on something when they "have" to — especially if it's for someone close to them. You're her sister, and she will probably get over it.

A good example of this is former U.S. Vice President, Dick Cheney. He's very conservative and was publicly anti-gay; that is until he realised that his daughter was gay.

What I'm saying is: your sister may be thinking one way now. But as soon as you tell her, she'll probably be thinking a completely different way about it.

If you're her best friend, you have even less to worry about, I think.

 

Why aren't you allowed to tell her?

My little brother is my best friend. I would kill or give my own life to save his without hesitation. There is nothing he could say or do that could ever change that.

Give her a chance to realize that.