I'm in high school right now, and I have friends like a bunch, I just don't hang out with themoutside of school. To get things straight first, I most definitely have at least 3 friends in all my classes that I can joke around with, partner up with for group activities, and walk to the next class with. The only problem is I don't have a specific group at all and I'm fine with this it's totally cool with me! But my entire family thinks otherwise. They all think I'm anti social and a loner(a loser) because I don't hang out with anyone after school. From about first grade on I never ever had anyone come over, except about 2 friends in 2 and 4th grade, and we are still friends now but not BFFs obviously were older now and in a bunch of different classes. But when my mother and my grandma used to tell me I need to get friends, I just blew it off and didn't care. But now my mom just said something was wrong with me because I don't have a life:tantrum: and have no friends. I keep telling her. I have friends a bunch of them but I don't like hanging out with people after school, I just don't and never have. I don't really get invited to stuff because I'm not in their "group". It's not because I dont have any friends...is it?? My mother just made me feel awful telling me I had no life. Were any of you in the same situation where you never really hung out with friends after school?(when school is over its a time for me to relax, and I don't have to worry about what others think because I'm alone. And I like it that way, but I just feel terrible because my entire family thinks I'm a loser and I'm fed up!!)
I grew up in a neighborhood with a bunch of kids. In school, we all seem to act like strangers like we didn't even know each other. I had two completely separate groups of friends...at school friends...and neighborhood friends. So...I kinda know what you're talking about.
We're in the same boat. My parents, especially my dad, like to put me down by telling me I have no friends and no life, that it's wasted on the internet and blah blah blah. Yet, they don't allow friends over and I can't go hang out with them unless my parents know them, but since I can't bring them over, obviously they'll never meet them so it's pretty stupid logic. However, I actually quite like being by myself. My classroom/school friends think I'm crazy by not going out, but it's not all that bad wanting to keep to yourself. Even if I don't hang out with people outside of school, I'm still socializing in the classroom, so I don't see how that counts as being anti-social. I hate when people tell me I have no life. What does that mean? That I'm dead? Just because I use my time differently than others doesn't mean I have "no life", I'm just doing what makes me happy and comfortable, not cool. I mean, it's good to try new things, but I shouldn't be forced into it; if I want to hang out with others, I will, just when I feel like I should.
To make an adult analogy school is equivalent to your job. Adults have friends at their job and many never see their work friends outside the workplace. Most adults consider social activity and friends away from work their social life. At work it is a forced grouping, after work are people of your free choice. It appears you have no friends of your free choice and rely on forced situations for friends. You cannot fault her logic. Stuck
it still doesn't give her the right to say I have no friends and no life, that's just, ...for me it's degrading, I'm getting fed up with it! If I got invited to things I would go but I don't ,she blames me for that she says i have to invite someone someplace if i really want to hang out.(which makes sense yes.)but if people really wanted me around they would invite me to places themselves and then later I would do the same(I guess I really just don't like thinking I'm not wanted)plus I don't really want to hang out she's making me, so why should I text someone(she makes me text someone if she sees me doing anything other than homework or chores) :bang::bang::bang:
my dads says the same thing and im going on 17 soon , i've never hung out with my friends outside of school , its fine. your not alone. im an introvert
I'm an extrovert who in high school fluttered around groups of people (while still spending a majority of time with my best friends) and got along with nearly everyone, but yet never hung out much after school with them. I never went to any parties in high school, and I never saw going to the skate park or the shopping centre as a fun activity. It all cost money for socialization I would get in school earlier in the day. My parents don't really pay attention, nor say anything about it but I don't feel lame. Honestly I wouldn't enjoy doing those extra curricular activities even though I enjoy people and get along with nearly everyone. You have friends, you just don't hang out with them 24/7 and that's perfectly fine. Don't stress about it so much.
