Right, Erm hi, I think i might be gay, I'm not worried about anyone finding out or being bullied, but Ive been really depressed lately, thing is, I dont know if im gay, and im still attracted to women but for a while ive not been able to help being attracted to men, i started off being able to block it out but here i am, a 15 year old, whos been having this problem for around six years, i am a virgin, I don't want to be gay, and i really like the idea of marrying a womab and having kids, but a few days ago, I got this horrible feeling, I haven't been able to sleep, I've been really depressed and havent been able to take my mind off it, with this problem, I needed to talk to someone, so i went and told my gay brother and my mum, my mum went to bed and I stayed with my brother, got drunk and talked about it, and it really helped and I, in my drunken honesty, realised im probably not gay and my brother agreed, we both thought i was being paranoid, like i usually am about most things, but the next day, the problem came back, even worse than before, and im even more depressed, I don't know if im gay, but I'm worried i am, keeping in mind I've been attracted to men and unintentionally fantasised oral and anal and kinda liking it, and i just dont know, I want to be straight, but i jus5 want this feeling to stop because i jusy want to die, help me, but bare in mind, I'm 15, confused, still like women, I'd give anything to not be gay and would try anything. HELP ME.
First, welcome to EC! Second, relax. Third, again, relax. Maybe you're straight. If you are, you'll go off, date some girls, maybe go to bed with some, possibly get into a serious relationship or two. No biggie. Maybe you're gay or bi. If you are, you'll go off, date some guys (and girls if you're bi), maybe go to bed with some, possibly get into a serious relationship or two. No biggie. Everything you envision on how "it's supposed to be" - marrying a woman, having kids, house in the suburbs, whatever else that entails? That's all still possible. Even if you're gay. You can still get married, have kids, have the house, all that. The only difference is your wife is going to have a penis. And that'll be because that's what you like. If you're usually "paranoid about most things", THAT is really what needs to be addressed more than your sexuality. It's not at all unusual for 15-year-olds to not really truly grasp their sexuality until later. And the usual advice we give is "give it time, and it'll work itself out". But if you're one to "freak out" about such things, you probably should work on getting a handle on that. Are you seeing anybody about that? Lex
It's not easy believe me. I tried to deny my feelings, but the more I tried the stronger they became. You're still young, so take this time to explore your feelings, by dating both girls/guys. Do you have a GSA at your school? I learned that talking to women just like me helped me become more comfortable with myself. And with you having a gay brother is great! He'll be able to help you
