I'm a 16 year old guy, and I'm gay. When I was about 8 I was sexually experimented with another boy around the same age, a lot, which I feel really bad about, and sometimes when I masturbate I think about that, which makes me feel worse >.> And today in English class we're reading To Kill a Mockingbird and towards the end the brother is says he's gonna teach the other kid to swim and that they're going to go naked so the sister couldn't go, which then I though about it and I got hard and aroused. Also(this was a few years ago) once I saw my younger cousin naked and I had this weird sensation in my penis, I wasn't really aroused, but idk what was happening; it was weird. And sometimes I look for animated porn with very young boys, gahh I'm really that I'm becoming a pedophile >.>
Try looking here. http://emptyclosets.com/forum/anonymous-discussions/80594-am-i-pedophile.html I think so long as you don't ACT on any of these urges. And you don't do anything illegal, you're okay. Who are we to say if they are 'normal' thoughts. But so long as you don't act on them....you're not a peadophile
true that^ but if you ever think you may, then be careful and ask for concealing, so you can avoid ever hurting anybody.
You are 16, your hormones are everywhere. Everything makes you horny at your age. Just don't act on those urges and don't seek it out. You'll be fine.
I think you should seek counseling now before it is too late. It is important to protect yourself and others. You certainly do not want to make a mistake that will cost you everything. Better safe than sorry. Please help yourself soon. Hope you do hugs.
You had an experience at an early age, and that was your introduction to sexual sensations. So it's natural that the experience you had is going to be part of your masturbation fantasies, because you don't have a lot of (or maybe any) other experiences to think about. When you read the story, it reminded you of your own experiences *when you were that age.* So what you're describing is really, really common. It doesn't mean anything, and certainly doesn't mean you're a pedophile. As you have other experiences with people around your own age, those fantasies will replace the earlier ones. I don't think it's anything to worry about as long as you don't act out on fantasies involving younger people, and nothing in what you've said implies any intent to do that.
The main thing is that you've acknowledged it and sought advice. Many do not and just go on to acting on their urges. I really feel for you because I couldn't begin to imagine the panic you are feeling at the moment. I suggest you talk to a professional about it, because suffering in silence won't help. Again, it's good that you've acknowledged those feelings and not acted on them; you're certainly not a pedophile for that very reason. I wish you the best, you're young and it may all be to do with your hormones and the sexual experiences you had as a child.
Another point I'd like to emphasize, is that perhaps you're just attracted to people your own age, or close to it. For example, when I was 13, guys would talk about how hot celebrities were; I never really felt attracted to (relatively) older women (and though I'm gay leaning relationship wise, I have an equal physical attraction to both genders), despite the fact that they were still young and attractive. I had crushes on girls my age, and that was about it. And even if you really are a pedophile in the sense that you found children attractive, although it sounds sick and fucked up, that's only true if you act on it. To corrupt an actual child is a sick and perverted act, what goes on in your own head is your own business, and shouldn't be judged. As long as the fetish is limited to fantasy and you never actually have the urge to act on it, it's fine. If you start feeling compelled to actually engage a child sexually, then I would talk to a therapist (sexual issues like that are part of certain therapists jobs).
Fantasy can be harmless in some cases, but you do want to be careful. In the case of fantasising over an experience you had as a child, the advice I would give is to not indulge it. I say this because all sex offences start with fantasy. I don't mean to scare you here, but they do. It's okay that you had a sexual experience as a youngster and natural that you find it arousing. However, it is important that your fantasies develop with you. May help to start exploring fantasy which involves adults - if you haven't already that is. That said, sometimes just because you are aroused doesn't doesn't mean you actually want to do it - lots of things can unintentionally trigger arousal (especially with hormones everywhere) so try not to label yourself. If you find yourself becoming pre-occupied with youngsters in the future then it would be a good idea to seek some counselling. eta typos
Nope you're not a pedophile or about to become one, the advice that Chip gave you is spot on. You're modelling your fantasies on your past experiences and as you experience new ones you'll replace them with those. You mentioned animated porn with young boys in it, don't go down that route. If you are curious and going to watch porn then watch porn with legal content, don't look for stuff that you know is wrong, whether animated or not.
