well, i had a date, or something along those lines, calling it a date makes me feel better about it. basically i met this guy who's deeply closeted and wanted to experiment, i was interested in more gaining experience going on a date and hanging out with a dude in a date like setting, and i admittedly was a bit horny. so what happened was we agreed to Skype and text to get to know each other to see if we connected enough to actually go through with this, and we did, so over the weekend he picked me up and we rented out a movie and went back to his place. laid out on his bed, and watched the movie irony setting in, we were joking that we would probably watch the movie for 10 minutes before we started to fool around, lol, i was expecting some awkwardness but not this much. we kinda sat on the bed but not really close to each other, i had to go use the restroom about halfway through and used the return to sit closer to him and see if that would do something, we kinda started letting our arms and legs touch and by the time the movie ended (so much for our boasting) we were both ready we just didn't know how to initiate anything. eventually i kinda hesitantly started touching his pants area, noticed the hard on, and laughed a little saying how funny the situation was and about talking earlier, he felt mine and we kinda started taking our clothes off and im going to stop now. anyway, no penetration, blow jobs, handjobs, kissing, that was it, we both agreed to not do anal on the first date but god we wanted to after we got into it, after that we both took a shower and put on pajamas and went to bed. about 4:37 he rolled over and started spooning me and it initiated round 2, this time though when we were done we didn't make a mess so we just fell asleep naked haha. now we were both complete virgins (as in not even kissed anyone) so i wasn't expecting a stupendous performance, i don't think he was a good kisser in the sense he shoved his whole tongue in my mouth and he got my mouth and cheeks wet, my lips were dry and kept getting dry for some reason. also, he didn't know how to prevent his teeth from bothering me during the blow job and he nearly tore my cock off so that kind of hurts too, he said he liked everything i did and i told what i didnt like (except the kissing because except for the mouth to mouth, anywhere felt amazing) so, was it basically a normal (if a little on the fast side) date/ friends with benefits? we're calling it that because this is more of a he finds me attractive and i think he's alright so we're going to fool around for a little bit then im hoping to slowly put time between our next encounters till hopefully we stop and act like normal people as i don't really have time for a relation ship and there isn't a lot to pick from. anyway (im sorry i post long posts, i have no one to talk to this about so it kind of just all spills here) i get back the next morning to my dorm at around 10, i told my roommate everything went fine, and he asked me some questions. what stuck out was that he asked me if our neighbor/ mostly my friend (i don't like calling it that but to normal people yeah he's my friend) knew about me. all i told him was that i was going on a date, and we kinda get a little touchy with each other (which i also have to admit does turn me on a little) and i was doing the one thing i told myself i wouldn't do (which is to get close to people, especially if they don't know about my sexuality). so that night during the Superbowl he asked me how my date went, we were by ourselves, he was sitting doing homework and i was chilling in a hammock, i was debating/ trying to psych myself up into telling him but he gave a good intro so i told him if he really really wanted to know. he asked if the twins would like it (there is a girl i like on campus and we hit it off in class one day but haven't talked to her since, that was last semester, i found out recently she has a twin, and that she dropped my major) and i told him that they probably wouldn't because i went on a date with a dude. he said "'cool bro, how was it?"' i told him he was a meh kisser, he told me that sucked, and we kept watching the game. he left to get his math homework but came back, i asked him not to tell anyone and he said okay. my roommate is concerned that he thinks im just gay but i dont think so. then when i hop on here, i noticed im out to a lot more guys than girls, and i think its because if i tell guys its because im letting them know so if they are interested or know someone then its easy, if i tell a girl then basically my chance of dating them drops to nearly 0 because then they will just assume im gay. does that make sense? anyway, sorry for the story.
