I'm currently in my mid-20s and started to question whether or not I was straight when I was a teenager. I have never had a crush on any guy and don't look at men and think, "I would love to screw him." It is pretty much all within the realm of my fantasies that I question my sexuality. Please pardon the potentially TMI of my sexuality issue. I want to get your guys opinions, maybe you've had similar thoughts to mine. Am I most likely gay, bisexual, HOCD, or just a weird straight person? Here are just some things I have noticed about myself: Here is the biggest point: Whenever I have a gay fantasy, my erection feels different than any of my other fantasies, straight or weird. I guess more "sensitive" is the way to describe it. It usually makes it easier to get off than if I have a straight fantasy. If I ever do fantasize about receiving head from a guy, it always gets me off really fast. I have never been able to have the same intensity of a fantasy of a girl sucking me off. I used to watch 80% straight porn and 20% gay porn but now it has probably shifted to around 40/60. Recently I have tried to embrace the mental idea of being gay, but it makes my fantasies when I masturbate less pleasurable and much harder to climax. I actually end up only being able to reach climax thinking about straight sex at that point. I enjoy shemale porn better than gay porn. I like girls with big breasts and having sex with them is pleasurable, even though I last a very long time and have to go really fast and focus hard on climaxing to actually climax. Besides the fact that I need to go hard to orgasm, I love to have sex with girls and when I have had girlfriends they thought I had way too much of a sex drive. I probably thought about men while having sex 5% of the time. Moreso when I was with girls who I didn't find as attractive. Have never done anything gay, I don't even care to look at dicks in a locker room shower. Not yet at least. I masturbate a lot, and have always had a penchant for really weird kinky porn. Whenever I received head from a girl and imagined it being a guy it got me off very quickly, but I was also kind of panicky from the taboo. I wasn't really raised in a family that dislikes homosexuality, but I know I would find it very hard to accept a gay identity in a straight world. So what do you guys think?
Hi, Welcome to Empty Closets! You seem to be very sexually interested in men, so I think we can probably rule out the idea that you are straight. When you are first questioning like you are, it's very difficult to tell whether you are bi or gay, because when gay people are in denial, they often manufacture feelings about the opposite sex. So, what I would recommend is that you focus on accepting your feelings for men, and wait to examine whether your feelings for women are genuine until you have sorted that out.
Hey man, I've been dealing with the same issues. I used to watch gay porn almost exclusively, that is untill I actually tried it. It was pretty eye opening. I realized the reality is way different than just fantasy. So it kind of killed alot of the fantasy because I realized I wasn't into it. Now, I mostly watch hetero or mmf porn that features an older male, why? I wish i knew. Like you, I still dont know my label. HOCD seemed like a real possibility because i was so much more obsessed With the questioning. I still go back and forth though, sometimes I feel completely hetero, sometimess I am like "Duh, I'm bi", and other times i feel like im gay just not digging it. I started seeing a shrink recently to try and figure it out. BTW, I know porn really messes with my head! I'll watch hetero porn, get off, then wonder if I'm gay...or get scared that I cant perform. I'm trying to kick porn, but damn its so hard! There is a site called: yourbrainonporn.com. If your like me at all, which sounds like you could be, I bet youll find this site very interesting. Check it out man, hit me up if you want, and good luck!
