Hey guys, I have a quick question. How do I do this: I want to hint that I'm gay to a guy that I know and have a pretty good friendship with. BUT I don't want him to know if he's straight. In other words, I'm asking what to say if I want to know whether or not he's gay, using a hint that he'll get if he's also gay, but a hint that he won't get if he's straight. Clear enough? -E.F.
You can't just come out to him? Otherwise, it's not the most tact method, but you could just ask him if he's gay.
BudderMC (ohai, hehe!): Hehe, it would be quite awkward to ask him. As in, what am I supposed to do? I feel like it would be the most intimidating thing, approaching him when he's alone and asking him "are you gay?" And, uh, well, no. I'm not ready to come out to him just yet. I'm worried he'll blab a bit.
Well, if you chose to come out - what would he say? I think there's been a lot of other posts on here about this. Frankly, if you're worried what he might say, is he worth it? Secondly, a lot of guys might not be ready. I know there was just a post about a gay guy (Guy A) who KNEW his friend (Guy b) was gay (it was confirmed by another friend.) Guy A told Guy B, yet Guy B didn't say a word. He just went along with it. So, you aren't give any guarantees in life. If it really means that much to you, then just come out to him.
id say you should wear like 'gay' stuff.. haha Like maybe a lady gaga shirt-- or a rainbow bracelet. maybe you should do the rainbow bracelet. I kinda use that to hint to people that I like guys haha. Sometimes straight guys notice-- and sometimes they dont. its worth a shot though lol
Maybe you should ask him something like in the movie Legally Blonde, where Reese Whitherspoon asks some guy what type of shoes she was wearing and if he guessed the brand he was gay, and if he say something like brown shoes, he was straight. ....just a thought. Or maybe you could mention some recent news related to homosexuality and what he thought, like recent marriage equality somewhere. But discuss other news first before bringing that up. Maybe that will give you a hint if he is or not. And maybe throw in there something like 'if you were gay and you were finally allowed to get married, would you think about adoption? I mean, do you think they should allow you to adopt legally? I don't know, these are the only two I can think of without being straight forward.
I like your second suggestion. That's a good way to at least bring up the subject. Keep in mind though that plenty of straight guys 100% support gay marriage and adoption. There are plenty of gay guys out there who would never be able to tell you what brand of shoes a woman is wearing. haha (I know I couldn't...Maybe that's because I'm only half gay lol :eusa_danc)
You know, I thought about that there's plenty of straight guys that support gay marriage and adoption, so that's why I thought of a more 'agresive' question, ''If you were gay ...''. Maybe his friend interrupts him before he can finish his question and says ''I'm straight'', and he can pretend to be intrigued about something else and continues ''I know, but I mean if you were ...''. Or maybe he doesn't say anything and then says ''Well, as a gay person myself ...''. Or he can say he doesn't give a crap :/, which I would assume he is straight. I know it's not bullet proof...
