I think I'm probably bisexual, but I'm not attracted to all genders in the same way. I am physically more drawn to men, emotionally more to women, and sexually more to whatever gender my body decides to pick that day. My problem is that this leads me to worrying that I'm straight. I know, most people worry about being gay/bi, but I'm frequently afraid that even with all I've been through I'll turn out to be straight after all. That all those months pining for a girlfriend were misguided. That my periodic sexual attraction to women was just a result of confusion. The worst part is that I can't convincingly dismiss these thoughts. I am definitely confused; is that the only reason I felt the way I did? I haven't really had any male figures play a major role in my life, so maybe that's why I can't see myself having a man as a partner. Or maybe the connection I desire with a woman isn't romantic at all and is purely platonic. But then I'll think of women and women who like women...and I get this intense longing, stronger than anything I've ever felt for a guy. I want to like women. I want my partner to be a woman. I want to fall for a woman, and have a woman fall for me. So why can't I shake this feeling that I'm really just a confused straight girl? Can anyone relate to this?
Actually, it's a common part of the coming out process for your mind to produce a "But what if I'm really straight!?" fear when coming to terms with yourself. It's another face of denial. I talk to people all the time who say things like that, so you are still perfectly normal, and still almost certainly queer.
Honestly, I thought I was the only one who was afraid that I'm just straight and confused! So, you are not the only one. I have worried (and still do) if I'm just making up my attraction women, and if I'm just really straight and have overthought it. But in the end, if you truly feel that you are bisexual and have experienced attraction to both sexes, even if it's in a different way, then you probably are.
Same for me! You are definitely not alone! I wonder if I just convinced myself of being gay almost every day! It's frustrating :bang:
It's good to know I'm not alone. It is ridiculously frustrating to go from being so sure I was a lesbian that I was embarrassed for re-coming out as bi to being equally sure I'm straight in the same day. I wish I could just find a girlfriend and be done with my questioning, but I know that it probably wouldn't be that simple.
I feel ya! I'm right there with you. :bang: Dealing with those thoughts is the most confusing part. I wish you could take a test like a pregnancy test; pee on a stick and if there's one line you're straight, two lines you're gay. My life would be far far simpler.
Probably not, actually. Most likely, your brain would glom onto the 0.5% of cases where the test gave a false positive, and keep saying, "But what if..." Because it is nothing rational that is keeping you doing this. It is irrational denial.
I feel the same way. I feel like I might just be tricking myself into thinking I'm lesbian when I'm probably just a really confused straight girl. Especially the fact that I actually want to be lesbian. I know everybody says don't be so quick to label yourself but it's hard. I just want to know for sure. I don't want to come out and then have to take it back. It won't be fair to try and date real actual lesbians who know for sure that they are into girls. I just want to know!!!! Happy to know I'm not alone with these feelings. ---------- Post added 15th Feb 2013 at 12:29 PM ---------- I experience the same exact thing. I hate it. I will have times where I'm like "yep, you are a lesbian" then some times where I'm like "No, you're not, you are just a really confused straight girl, then some times where I feel like "Maybe you're bi." This questioning phase sucks!!!! I'm just happy to know I'm not going through it alone.
