I know this isn't as super serious as other problems BUT here's the deal. This is my 1st real job. I work at a supermarket. I got hired when I was still at college but I dropped out (was planning to leave after my 1st year when I had achieved my HNC) so I'm still contracted as part time but if there is over time I will more than likely take it. My manager has asked me if I'd like to develop and I did say yes. Like I do like the idea and I'm kind of like dont know till I try it. There are some aspects of retail I like working. And I don't HATE my job and I like who I work with (but as people have joked if it wasn't for my 2 best friends in particular I'd be long gone). Also I've seen how much I have grown since getting this job. Negative aspect is that I'm not exactly super passionate about it (just FYI I'm not really on any development thing, I have only attended a series of modules but I found them motivational and uplifting tbh). My manager takes advantage of me. Like because I'm so naive in terms of not working and just naive in general but also she mostly offers me the shirt shifts as overtime and if I take it I'm a doormat and shell keep treating me like shit but if I reject it a)I am just stuck to my contracted 23 hours a week and b)I get a reputation as a lazy brat. What really bothers me most (especially today) is that when I try hard I never get recognised but when I slack off ( and I'm not going to lie, I can be a bit of a chatterbox) everyone chastises me BUT when I do slack I still get everything done. I don't know what I want at my job. I've only been there for a year and that's my 1st year working tbh so I'm still green but I don't have any desire to return to education and I do prefer the hours not being standard 9-5'where I'm sitting down in an office all day. But (maybe just because of today) I just feel other than my friends that's it. I don't mean to play the victim but as "shit" as I am at work if I'm "lazy and incompetent" which I know is not true (I'm no angel or superstar but I'm not that bad) whenever I overcome obstacles and work my arse off no one seems to see it therefore won't recognise it.
I've learned if they offer you some sort of development don't turn it down, you will only regret it later. Nothing says if you try and be a supervisor/manager you have got to stay there for the rest of your life, nothing also says you have to apply for future promotion. Being taken advantage of by a manager is nothing new, most see young part timers (I've been the victim of it just as much) as cannon fodder and can just use and abuse them as they need the money/never complain/don't want to say no etc etc. I would not personally do all the hours god sends just to please them and instead do enough just to get me noticed.
Many people seem to view things in black-and-white terms. Either they have to accede to everything people say, or they have to be a bitch/dick and people will hate them. There's nothing wrong with taking a middle ground. If you're offered extra shifts, you can say "Can I check my schedule and get back to you?" And if there are any specific shifts you don't want to work, you can certainly say so. "I can do these two shifts, but I'd rather not do this overnight shift on Wednesday. Could you find somebody else to cover that one?" That's definitely not being unreasonable. Similarly, feel free to go the extra mile on projects. When you finish them, just make sure you let somebody know. "I finished that project in the produce section for you." You don't have to make a big deal about it - just remind them that you did it. Lex
see i'm always someone who believes in better the devil you know than the devil you dont over the grass is greener on the otherside. im aware that this is a very common thing in the workplace for people like me in particular. I've had confrontations with my manager a few times with me saying i am a team player and im flexible but there are limits. but its as if i have to do it every so many months to refresh her memory ---------- Post added 18th Feb 2013 at 08:35 PM ---------- problem is the people i work with (and my mum and my sister) are the same. they call me a lazy brat when i reject overtime but when i tell people "im doing...tomorrow" they're all like "youre working AGAIN?!!!" and im like how can i win. I do what's best for me because no one else will look out for me and that's the same for everyone else but it literally seems that i cant win. I dont like to blow smoke up my arse and I rarely want to (I much prefer doing the opposite) but for over a week I have worked my arse off and ,at the risk of sounding mellodramatic, had big obstacles to face and frankly I've tackled them but no one saw them so they didnt happen
That part in bold is the important part. In fact, it's the only part. If your mother and sister seem to have two modes - "you're being lazy" and "you're working too much" - that means you're not going to be getting any positive reinforcement in that direction anytime soon. No use going back to a well that's always dry. Work as much or as little as you'd like, and stop giving a rat's ass as to what your relatives think about your work schedule. Lex
tbh ive never thought my mum or my sister were in the right. fact is they dont work where i work so they no nothing about what goes on. what bothers me is that the people at work seem to have the same thoughts as them. Now there is no smoke without fire but as ive mentioned before, people seem to focus on my negatives over my positives and i can hand on heart (and i am my own worst enemy who constantly puts myself down) know that my positives outweigh my negatives. When someone with low self-esteem like me says that but even my friend who has worked even more than i have says ive busted my arse (unfortunately he is one of the people i muck around too much with but like him i can muck around and still get the job done) I have done 3 11 hour shifts in a week and even my standard 8 hour shifts have consisted me of busting my arse. I really want to talk about this to someone but my options consist of my best friends that i apparantly talk to too much and do nothing else at work, people that dont think i do anything that i work with or my relatives who agree with people they've never met It does sound like I'm in the wrong and I havent thought about it since 12 o'clock today and to just stress my point I am someone who does almost loathe themself, I constantly put myself down to the point people tell me to get a grip but I still think I am NOT in the wrong. I may not be perfect but the more you ignore my pros and focus on my cons i'm going to lose motivation and just be lazy. When I care I'm positive, the more I get shat on, the more negative I will be
