im bi possibly gay. There is no doubt i have attractions for both sexes, more emotionally to men but i can easily get aroused by girls and can name several girls im attracted to off the top of my head. What do i tell people if they ask me if im gay? I give a gay vibe, and maybe more gay than straight but honestly i can daydream about some girls and get aroused, i can sit and think about certain girls and feel in "love". Don't post anything stupid, think about it first.
IMHO it depends on the person, if they are not the type to judge tell them that you are questioning and aren't sure, but if they are the type to judge (though i may get some heat for saying this) it is best to deny it, than to risk an out of hand situation, but it all depends on the person
Are you asking how to "appear" more straight in terms of stereotypical male mannerisms and behavior? From the looks of this description, you clearly seem bisexual.
I feel exactly the same way and have the same question as you so I can't offer advice, but hopefully it's some consolation to know you are far from alone in this situation :icon_bigg
What's wrong with people thinking you're gay? If they ask you, you can always say "I like women" and not have to lie about it. You're just not saying that you ALSO like women.
I used to say the same thing when I thought I was BI. Except I said that 'i like boys' I never said anything about girls so i didn' have to lie. Now I only say 'the person i like...'
Number 1 tip: Don't pretend to be something that you're not. You've just admitted that you're bi, ergo you cannot be straight.
Something it took me a long time to realize, your life turns into something you don't want it to be if you live up to everyone else's expectations. You're a lot more likely to find an open minded and caring partner if you're open about your sexuality. Something else I've learned, a lot of straight women like it when a guy makes himself a little vulnerable and goes against the grain a little. Basically, you need to figure out what you want. It may be that living a straight life will get you that. But if you want a little bit of flexibility, say you want to be comfortable watching gay porn in your house or talking to your girlfriend about hot guys, the cost is honesty. If you just want to find someone that makes you happy, though, then there's nothing wrong at all with just sharing the straight side of you with another person. The cost here, is that it's going to take effort from you every single day keeping part of yourself hidden. Just set some boundaries early on. A lot of people do make that work. It's your choice. From my experience, though, picking B and then going to A is not fun at all for either of you no matter how open minded she is. If you do pick plan B, and you change your mind, make really really sure it's worth it. Your relationship will change, and not necessarily in a way you expect it to. ---------- Post added 25th Feb 2013 at 10:54 AM ---------- One other thing. As someone who used to give off the "gay vibe" before I pretty much squashed anything feminine about me. The answer I've found is just to not care. Some people are just going to view me as a dude that likes dudes. The idea that I'm a woman that likes other women is just not going to fit into people's minds. They know the way the world works, and this ain't it. It'll feel dishonest. But really imagine what it's like to someone who is a gay man. They had just as hard a time accepting the label. It sucks ass accepting it. But now they have, and they're comfortable with it. And now there's us, and we're trying to kinda sorta dodge the label while still asking them for help and support. I'm a gay woman born male. You're a bisexual man. We're both queer. And queer is all the people asking that question are going to see once we start coloring outside the lines in the open. Probably the easiest way if you wanna live a straight life and just not have to be openly queer - and you don't have to - is just to tell the woman you're interested in the truth, and then keep everything in the bedroom. Good luck to you no matter what you choose.
How to live a straight life? If you're straight, be you. If you're otherwise, be you and only date straight. Even if you "act" gay, nobody can gain an inch of ground if you insist you aren't and your deeds back up your words. With that said, I'd be looking for opportunities to come out of the closet. Hiding is convenient, useful and often the best choice, but being open is so much sweeter.
If you have to ask a "how to" for something you believe to be natural, it probably isn't natural. When I used to try to shut out my attraction for men, I would sometimes search the Internet for any information on how to re-wire my brain and untangle my attractions for men. I was convinced that there was something fundamentally wrong with me, and if I was broken, then I could be fixed. If you go to war with your mind, you will be at war forever.
Even before coming out to myself, people would always ask if I were gay. Maybe because I was just a nice guy who liked to look nice.. or maybe because most of my friends were girls. When people would ask me I would of course deny and say that I was straight. I say just be yourself, and if people ask, tell them the truth.. if you feel like you are able to. Otherwise, don't flat out deny it.. just avoid a real answer. Just be who you are. Don't try to be someone you aren't because you're just lying to yourself.
