i know by now that there have been many different threads about teens and their sexuality problems, but i only ask that you hear me out. you see, a couple days ago my school sponsored a playgroup to come and put on a play about homosexuality called "The Other Side of the Closet." This play really opened up my eyes to the different reactions people could have when you come out ,and frankly, some scared me horribly. in this play, a guy came out as gay, and some of his friends completely shut him out. that got me thinking, "what if my friends react like that?" im very social and to think that ive lost the friendships ive had for so long just to become an outcast is something i fear greatly. i know for a fact that i am gay, and i cant change that, but seeing how teenage guys got beaten up by others just because of their sexuality scared me senseless. it reinforced the idea that i should just keep putting up the heterosexual front i've had for so many years. but lately ive been feeling depressed, and i feel the need to tell someone. that is why i came to this site to voice my troubles. i would come out but my school isnt very accepting of people that are different so im forced to play the straight role everyday. my parents also hold high expectations for me and always talk about how great a girl would be to deserve me. and im scared that ill disappoint them, and that they could potentially disown me. right now i can say that im not proud to be gay but not exactly ashamed either. rather, i accept the fact that i am who i am, and thats all i can be. but sometimes it just gets so hard that i just dont know what to do.
My parents say th exact same thing or my dad does my mom used to. I came out to my mom. Believe me after you come out its awesome ive only come out to like 10 people but its getting better and better i dont think i will ever come out to my whole school. Frankly it isnt really any of their business. How are are you by the way? Yea i live in the bible belt i can relate alot it does not accept gays at all. I am afraid to lose some friends over it too. And when people asay if they were your true friends they would stick by your side..... it still would hurt like a bitch to lose them. You know... Just yesterday one of my good friends was talking about how being gay is so nasty and it hurt me to know that soemone ive known since 4th grade would hate me over something like my sexuality. Really its funny we shouldnt be embarrassed by our sexuality they should i mean seriously.
yeah thats exactly what i mean. lately....ive been feeling a bit depressed. but i try not to show it to my friends. ive only recently come to realize my sexuality so sometimes i still cant believe it. today 3 of my friends and i had this conversation about homosexuals and being able to accept them. 2 of them (both girls) said that they were fine with it and in fact had always wanted a gay friend. the other,my best friend, who is a guy, didnt seem too thrilled. he accepts it, but im not sure if hell still like me for me.
