Hi, I've been planning on coming out when I'm in 9th grade which is next year, but I don't have any idea when... I bet this will sound weird so I'll explain. I don't want to come out when I have Gym Class, mostly because I don't think people will be comfortable changing or showering in the same room as a homosexual male. Also, it's the perfect place to make gay jokes and stuff like that, and I don't want to be pretty much trapped with people like that. In my school they obligate Gym Class in 9th grade only, and only for one semester. I was thinking about coming out after the first semester because then I could avoid gym class, but there's no way of knowing if Gym Class will be in the first or second semester. If I can't avoid this Gym Class dilemma I have, what are ways to deal with it? Should I even be worried? Thank you, sincerely, 1Jake2
It's tempting to look at your timeline as if there IS one specific time when it's ideal to come out. And it really doesn't work like that. Yeah, there are a few times when coming out is a bad idea - don't do it during church service, and it's a bit showboat-y to interrupt your cousin's wedding reception to announce your orientation. But in general, "coming out" is just something to get to the other side of. If you feel confined or really want to come out at some point, that's a good time to do it. It's possible that being "freshly out" might have some people toss some looks your way while you're in gym. But then again, if anybody does say anything, you can always refute it with "Well, I figured you deserved to know. Had I not told you, I'd still be gay and using the changing room with you, but you just wouldn't know." Lex
I actually never thought of coming out as just a "when you're ready" type thing.. I tend to over analyze situations and make a plan. I also worry about other people more than myself, which sucks because it's my decision and my feelings. I shouldn't care what Jim Bob what ever thinks about me coming out! (Not a real guy by the way) This actually really helped me, a lot. Thank you so much for that! Sincerely, 1Jake2
As someone also from Ontario and also had the "horror" that was Grade 9 gym, let me offer my experience. It'll probably depend largely on what school you go to and what teachers you've got, but for me, gym wasn't that bad. I wasn't athletic at all but I think I only got picked on for it once, to which my teacher told the other guys to stop doing right away. As for the changerooms, for me it was a "get in, get changed, get out" kind of thing. Pick a corner, switch your clothes, and then get out. No harm, no foul. Occasionally there were gay jokes thrown around in the changeroom (none towards me though), but the teacher again stepped in and told people to basically grow up. If you're lucky like me, I had it last period of the day, so if we were running late our teacher would let us go home without changing. I guess what I'm getting at is just be mature while you're in gym class. I don't think I've ever seen the mature kids pulling stupid stunts and making fun of other kids, nor are they (often) the targets of those things. Stay out of the immature kids' way, make friends with the mature kids (at least for gym), and you should have pretty smooth sailing. If you're really worried or anxious about it, then maybe it would be better to wait until after you've finished gym. It might help ease your nerves and would also give you the opportunity to make some friends in high school, rather than being "out" to a bunch of strangers. Having a group of friends to support you is always a nice bonus (even better if they're in your gym class ).
I always felt uncomfortable shower and all that stuff after gym class. I try to just be as discreet as possible though. This is one of the things I have considered as well for when I come out. That people might get uncomfortable around me. However then again I have thought about how I have had to suffer through years of uncomfortableness and well... They can damn well have it. If they have a problem with who I am they can go f' themselves. And really, they shouldn't be uncomfortable since, who would actually want to get aroused in the changing room. It's awkward enough as it is. I wouldn't exactly stand and look at other guys junk in the changing room to get aroused. I can jut go on the internet when I'm alone and avoid the awkwardness/creepiness. Hope all goes well. And don't worry too much about what random people might think of you. Unless they are mental and you suspect they might hurt you if they do find out you are gay. If that is the case, you should probably not come out while your gym class is still going on.
Wow! Still getting so much help! BudderMC, I am pretty anxious about it, and still think it's a good idea to wait. But I guess you'll know what I decide to do if there's a out story by me later next year. The gym teacher isn't in the Change room while we change, but I doubt anyone would throw slurs or jokes my way. I have a friend that will be in the same gym class as me and I came out to him already so I'm sure if anything would happen he'd be there to defend me. I'm glad you went through the 9th grade gym experience though, it's good to have someone that knows what I'm going to have to go through give me advice on this kind of stuff. I hope my experience is as good as yours! I really value your opinions. Thank you very much! Formality, I'll try not to worry about it. I have lot of time to worry about it next year when it actually happens! Haha! And no, they aren't going to hurt me. At least I hope not o.0.Unless they randomly start wanting to beat on people D: Thank you for your help and your thoughts on the subject!
