So I told my mother....

Hello, I thought I had posted this threat last night. Apparently my internet connection thought differently. I'm new to the forum, so it will be nice to meet everyone.

On to the dilemma. I came out to all of my friends last summer, and more recently to my sister and her husband. Unexpectedly, it was met with unanimous love and caring. Such awesome friends! My sister began pressuring me to tell my mother. For some back story, nearly all of my dad's family are Pentecostal (my mother included). I used to be myself, but left for my own reasons. I've been attracted to men my entire life, and no matter how hard I prayed, or ignored it, the attraction would not go away.

I've been dating my current boyfriend for four months now, and have never been happier. Coming out to mom went as I had anticipated, if not a little bit different. Of course, at first it was met by "you know what the Bible says about that" and "it's an abomination". She shocked the hell out of me by quoting the cliche "Adam and Steve" reference. I was prepared for those arguments, and have since been doing some studying to combat future encounters with such things. Her more caring side appeared when she said "I just don't want people to be mean or look down on you".

I know she is coming from a place of love. She is not the damning type. But the grimace and hurt look on her face were the part of coming out that I did not expect. True, she was last in line for people I plan on telling. But I don't think it was because of that. My sister told me that she still had the hurt look this weekend (three days later). It hurts me that it hurts her.

Everyone I have spoken to have said that it will get better in time, and that she just needs to work through this. But it hurts to watch her hurt.

The way I see things going is: 1) she will love me regardless, and that love will be extended to my boyfriend (whom she hates now). Or 2), in Pentecostal fashion, she will ignore my pleas that I've always been this way, and see it as the work of the devil. I'm sorry if my analysis of Pentecostals offended anyone, but I've been there. If #2 happens, there never will be any acceptance. She may still love me, but her efforts would be focused on saving me rather than loving who I am.

She is my best friend, and I don't want to lose that because she isn't willing to open her mind and accept something different. Truly I can say this is the happiest I've been in my entire life. I have the most wonderful boyfriend, whom I care for with a love I didn't think I was capable of. No longer do I hide behind half truths and lies. Everything is out in the open, and it feels incredible. I have no doubt that I'm in the right for coming out to her. It's just very hard to deal with.

Does anyone have any advice? Forgive if my post wandered and I ranted. I tend to do that when emotional. Thank you for your time.