So I am home for Easter and well I am awkward with Mum at the moment. When I first came out she was cool with it and accepting. However since I have entered in a gay relationship she tells me to keep my options open, that I shouldn't rush into it and she keeps on saying that "I know you think you are gay but...." I think she isn't as accepting as I first thought :icon_sad: How do I convince them that I am happy. I love them but I don't know what I have done wrong
Just continue as you are. You're in a relationship, she'll accept it with time. Congratulations though!
It sounds to me like your family was willing to accept your orientation in the abstract but now that you have a boyfriend they are suddenly getting hit with the mental reality. As in, they are suddenly having to wrap their brains around the mental image of you kissing that guy. Of you sleeping with that guy. Of you..ahem...with that guy. Three things: a) You convince them you are happy by continuing to be happy. Your happiness should not be contingent on their (or anyone else's) acceptance of your happiness. b) You haven't done anything wrong and their lack of acceptance is not your fault nor is it your problem. It is their problem. c) You've told them what the situation is. It's your life. Whether they like it or not...really doesn't matter. You don't really need to waste time arguing with them, just making listening noises, smile benignly, and say something firm but slippery such as 'I'm quite happy with the options I'm exercising now.' or 'I appreciate your concern' or the like. Refuse to engage or engage in such a relaxed, pleasantly non-committal way that they exhaust themselves feeling like they are punching sand to useless effect. Really, it's quite entertaining to watch if you can both keep up the performance and mentally sit back and observe it. Todd
