"WOT? HOW CAN THIS BE TRUUUUUUU!" I dunno. I'm gay, I know I'm gay, and I want to come out. HERE'S THE PROBLEM! My family is.. well, let's just say, being the gay son/nephew/grandson is not something anyone would want. Not that my family would HATE me for being gay, but.. they wouldn't really embrace it either. My friends ask me if I'm gay, as I've always been single, I show absolutely no interest in relationships, and.. I can be pretty fruitay sometimes. :dry: I'm more than certain they don't truly believe I'm gay. How should I come out? When should I? I have some openly gay friends who I know would support me, but.. I feel uncomfortable. I can't just walk up to them and blurt it out. I'd die of embarrassment. I can't ask to have a private conversation with them either. I'd suffer the same, humiliating fate as the first scenario. I was thinking of trying to connect more with one gay friend in particular. Maybe, if we could connect and spend more time together, he could develop some feelings for me. Maybe he would tell me about his feelings, then I could tell him the news. Come out and obtain a possible relationship at the same time? It's a win-win! Too bad he's recently been taken. -100 Vigor. My ideal way of coming out would be to do it discreetly. Slip it into a conversation and get over it quickly. I don't want to linger on it in a conversation. I'd start to feel awkward. I'm sure this will change as I mature more. I'm only 16. Haha.. >_> Can I get some tips on coming out? Can you guys share how you did in a nutshell? I need some ideas. :icon_redf PS: Is it weird if I'm not distraught at the fact that I'm gay? I never was. It's like I skipped the craving phase of pregnancy; it just doesn't make sense. Sure, I wonder and worry about my future, but I have absolutely no issues with who I am. PPS: Hello everyone at Empty Closets! If this thread is in a completely wrong section, please don't kill me. I just joined and I'm still learning the ropes.
I also felt too embarressed about it to tell my family. I eventually told my mother, and I was promptly mortified for a month. I think I'm never going to tell the rest of my family. I'll just bring a boyfriend home from college someday! Straight people dont have to declare that they're straight!Why should gay people go around telling people theyre gay? Maybe you could do that. Also, it isnt strange to not feel distraught about being gay. I didnt either. (Then again , my family is very liberal, and I declared myself an athiest a year or two before I realized that I was gay.) Oh, and welcome to EC!
Hey. Welcome to EC :welcome: It's definitely not weird that you're not distraught :lol:. You're really lucky to have skipped that phase and moved on to the acceptance part! I know that this may not sound particularly helpful and kind of vague, but it's impossible to tell you when to come out or how to come out. You will know when to come out, almost instinctively. It sounds weird, but you'll just know. You'll feel kind of different, it's really hard to describe. On the how part, you'll know that too. I had planned to tell my mother face to face but instead decided to do it over e-mail (maybe not the best route). It just felt more right, if that makes sense. Maybe your gay friend would be a good place to start the coming out process. He's probably going/gone through the same things so he might be useful to talk to and a good for support. Good luck!
His point being that unlike most first posts, he's quite happy and just needs some questions answered. Of course, that was just my interpretation lol.
Have you made a decision? I mean, know need to rush, but you could at least comment on our suggestions. That came out wrong. Im better at poetry than writing forum posts, sorry.
Oh, of course, lol. As you said, I might just live my life and let people figure out for themselves. Maybe picking up hints over time, then finally concluding would be less... shocking? I read somewhere on these forums that this one person wouldn't tell anybody, but wouldn't deny being gay if asked. I may try that, also. I get asked every once in a while as it is. Ironically, my gay friends are pretty much the only ones who haven't asked me that oh-so-awkward question. I may just have to tell them. Then again, news spreads around my network of friends rather quickly, so I might only have to tell a few people before most of my friends knew. ... Not sure if that's good or bad. Haha
They probably haven't asked because they know that there's nothing worse than somebody asking you if you're gay before you're ready to come out. That's my plan too. I'm just going to tell some of my louder, more gossipy friends and let it spread like wildfire.
I just hope my friends wouldn't spread it TOO much.. There are some undesirable people who don't need to know.
