Ok, so whether I've told them or whatever, 8 people know that I'm gay, 7 friends and a teacher (I didn't tell them, long story). So my plan is to come out to my mom really soon, like hopefully in the next week or so. The next issue is coming out at school. Now I understand that they don't need to know, but I would feel better if I could just be open and not have to conceal who I am anymore. I've been conflicted, however, on how to do this. I have several different plans, but the one that sticks out most is what I call the "letting them off their leash" technique. Basically, I would let those 7 friends (who I obviously trust to do this right) "off their leash" and let them start telling people if they so choose, leaving me to confirm it if they want to know. Although this has some risks (by the end of the day I could be a raging flamer who has the hots for everyone in my class that had an intimate relationship with a "close friend" in 7th grade), I believe that this will be the easiest and least awkward method. I would of course try to keep what these friends say to everyone under tight grip, and will diligently make sure this goes off without a hitch. It's a risk/benefit analysis, and I'm willing to take the leap. Being completely open is a dream that's been in development for years, and I'm excited knowing that it is just around the corner!
Well that definitely isn't how I would do it, but it sounds like it would be easier than telling every single person and dealing with it, let them find out and then approach you. Maybe it's not a bad way to do it.
Sounds like it would be effective, but impersonal. If you just want everybody to be aware of your sexuality then I'd say go for it, but make 100% sure that all the people that truly matter don't find out through the trickling gossip. They deserve a face to face moment.
Yup, gossip runs like wildfire. That is the problem, gossip runs fastest through the empty headed. Your 7 friends may be reliable but 3rd and 4th hand gossip is totally off leash, crapping on the floor and showing its teeth to many.
Firstly, thank y'all for the advice. I have really taken it all into consideration, and laid it all out on the table. I think I've told almost everyone who needs to hear it (besides maybe one or two I'll sit down with one-on-one). And I know with the rumors damage control will be key, but it wouldn't be my first rodeo (long story). So thanks again!
Well, it's totally up to you... It sounds like you have things settled out and all, too. Just keep in mind that whatever others think of you does not really matter. Essentially, you might be inciting flames for gossip to steam in, and you should be prepared to hear a bunch of interesting / crazy stuff about yourself. Just take it with a dash of humour =)
Riding a rumor will indeed be like riding a buckin' bronco... A Winston Churchill quote comes to mind... "A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on."
If you do happen to go through with "letting them off their leash", then be aware that the messages you tell them may not be the the same when it comes back to you. Gossip can easily be twisted for emphasis, and of course, you run the risk of the gossip spreading to the wrong people. If you've considered these, and they honestly don't bother you, then by all means go for it! I hope it goes well for you - both with your school and your mother. it won't be easy, but you have our support.
