Hello! I'm brand new to the community and I'm happy I found a place to talk about knowing who I am and things like that.:smilewave I've known for quite a while that I am gay. Even from being 11-12 and looking at muscular guys or athletes just gives me that warm, fuzzy feeling inside of me. I also live in a place that really isn't to accepting of LGBT or there isn't a lot of LGBT people where I live. So i'm pretty stuck with no one to be in a relationship with, or with people to talk about who I think is cute and just about being gay in general. Parents are extremely accepting of me, and I'm so happy for that. I told 2 co-workers and one of my friends from college knows. But that's it. Now, for some odd reason, the thought of having sex (whether it is male/female, male/male, or female/female), does NOT appeal to me. I don't have any urge to have sex with another guy. What I really want to do is just cuddle, kiss, and any other romantic thing you do in a relationship, EXCEPT the sex. I was just curious is there anyone out there that is like me. People who want to be with someone M/M or F/F) and don't want to have sex?
It appears to be some form of asexuality, however, is this something you dislike because you've tried it or because you dislike the idea from the get go?
You definitely sound as if you are asexual. If the idea of sex does not appeal to you at all and all you want to do is the romance part.
Yes. All I want is just a romantic relationship with a guy. I'm just curious to know if that's sort of common. Or is there anyone on here that has the same situation?
I MIGHT be like that. But I also have a hormonal disorder, so I won't know until I'm 18, at which point the doctor will finally give me testosterone. My parents think it's "unnatural" or something.
Keep in mind the relationship you describe is necessary before many of us can take the next step, which is sex. Having that foundation makes sex possible and enjoyable. Think about the ice cream on a cone. Would you enjoy the ice cream if a scoop was plopped in the palm of your hand? The foundation of the cone under the ice cream makes it possible to fully enjoy it. Don't count yourself out yet. Build a foundation with somebody and see what happens.
i agree with the other that you may be a homoromantic asexual (or gray-asexual or demisexual). what do all these terms mean? see this post: http://emptyclosets.com/forum/1360359-post4.html it should be noted, though, that what you have described in your posts seems to be more related to libido or sex drive....? asexuality (like gray-asexuality and demisexuality) refers to a lack of sexual attraction, which you may also be experiencing, but a lack of or low sex drive is a separate matter. either way, you definitely aren't alone.
I can relate, and thought I was not interested in sex either. I found out that I'm slow to warm to a person. She needs to have certain positive characteristics in her personality that I find attractive -- and demonstrate them consistently over time (so I know it isn't fake). The complex weaving of lives & bodies takes time. Quality, meaningful ... you may just be a rare, good soul who needs to be stimulated by a good heart, mind, service ... etc. It takes time to establish a deep connection. This is not represented very well in our media (tv, movies, etc). It is hard to understand yourself & your attractions if you don't usually see yourself represented in the world around you.
