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I'm scared I'll be in the closet so much longer.

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Lully, Apr 14, 2013.

  1. Lully

    Regular Member

    Joined:
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    Location:
    Illinois
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    When I use to think about being gay I would always be optimistic like ,Oh when I get in high school I'll meet more people like me and I'll express myself. I always thought about the LGBT club and all of that. But now I'm not so optimistic. Next year, I'm going to a Catholic private school and I really don't think they're all that accepting or even have a LGBT club. And the whole coming out to my parents thing, My dad doesn't seem to mind gay people because he's always friendly and never has a problem being friends with them or even talking about them so I'm not that scared of him. My mom is another story, she is like the most homophobic person ever. I don't talk to her much anymore (other reasons) and I know if i told her it would only get worse. It just scares me how many people I'll have to drop because they don't accept it, and I'm starting to wonder if i should casually ease myself from talking to people like that. Only person I've told i was gay is my bisexual friend but I told him I was bi even though I know I'm a lesbian. And my stomach still churns from telling him. (I guess i just wanted to let that out)
     
  2. The Dude

    Full Member

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    Hey there, welcome to EC!

    I can relate a lot to your post, about the optimism at first and then how it faded. I'm in college now though, but am just sort of accepting my sexuality. At least you accepted yours, that's a great start. You sound like your in middle/high school from the info you put down, so you're years ahead of me.

    It sounds to me like your parents are separated it; even if they aren't, however, it sounds like you could tell your dad. And what about your friends? Even if you're going to a new school, do you have any friends you could talk to who you think would be accepting? And with your bi friend, you could always tell him the truth, or say something like "I thought I was bi but now I think I'm a lesbian." Or just be honest and say you were nervous. With one of my best friends who I told, I told him everything. Complete, blunt honesty so I know I would avoid saying a lie and regretting it later. But if your friend is bi he will probably understand, so I wouldn't dwell on it...

    I don't know what grade you're in, but there is always college. High school may seem like a long time, but it blows by. And you could still be out to a few friends and go still to a Catholic high school.

    You should keep looking around this site and sticking with it. It's been a great resource for me these past few months. There are people here who can give much better advice than I can, but maybe I said a few things of value (I think so).

    Good luck to you...if you need anyone to talk to there's people here, myself included.
     
  3. eatsleepclimb

    Full Member

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    Hi! Welcome! Yeah I'm in high school too, I'm having a similar experience--I also go to a small private school, and my religion (catholicism) is still an important part of my life. Only a few people know, but I'm desperate to leave the closet soon--at least before college! If your parents give you enough independence, you could look around for an out-of-school lgbt club. I know my neighborhood bookstore has a lgbt book club--something like that would definitely be helpful. It is really comforting and supporting to know that you are not the only one!
    :goodluck: