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I have a predicament.

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by iwannabemyself, Apr 15, 2013.

  1. iwannabemyself

    Regular Member

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    Location:
    Bloomington, IL
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Well I am a 16 year old male who lives in a diverse community and is only out to certain people. But not at all out to my family. I grew up in a really christian family and my parent's faith is the most important thing in their lives. Ever since I remember, I was told that being gay is a sin and immoral. But ever since I was 12, I realized I never was attracted to girls but to guys. I wanted to deny it for so long. But I finally accepted who I am and no one can change me. But I am scared to come out to my parents and at school. I love to play football. I have been playing ever since I was 8. I still play in high school and a starting defensive linemen for varsity, but most of my teammates are either homophobic, or use gay slurs. I don't know what would happen. Would I be rejected or accepted. I know it's against the law to discriminate because of sexual orientation, at least where I live. But I wouldn't be on a team that would hate on me. So this is why I am afraid to come out. I could take school and what would happen, but if my parents start treating me differently, that would kill me on the inside. So I need some advice. Anybody play football who is openly gay? How did it go? Or if you have super religious parents? How did that go? I am open for any advice or suggestions? :help:
     
  2. theCHIVEguy21

    Regular Member

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    Location:
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    Gender:
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    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    I had known for a while that I wasn't attracted to women even before high school. I knew I wouldn't come out in high school because I knew I wouldn't be ready and I really wasn't sure if I would be accepted. I went to a catholic high school and I knew some people were not accepting because what was taught. What scared me was there was a kid (didn't know him that well) that left because he was being made fun of because he was gay. and some of them were on the football team.( I'm not trying to scare you there is a point.)

    I had a really good friend who was gay, he played football and was on the track and field team with me. He was an all around nice guy and had a great sense of humor and made everyone laugh, and was loved by all. He waited until his junior year to come out because he was uneasy like me. At the beginning of the season at the first team dinner, he made the announcement. "I have something to tell you guys before we start the season....I am gay. I know some of you may not be okay with that, so just lets get it all out."

    He was really surprised how most of the guys on the team were so accepting. He asked his teammate (who was one of the people who harassed the other guy) why was he accepting of him and not the guy freshman year. His teammate said that the other guy tried to feel up another guy on the team, thinking he was gay, and was verbally forceful about it.

    The guys on the team were young and had a preconceived idea on what a gay guy is like. Don't try and force it on the guys, show them your personality to break the negative idea of being gay.
     
  3. iwannabemyself

    Regular Member

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    Location:
    Bloomington, IL
    Gender:
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    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Well I am well known and well liked. Most of them already know my personality and how i act. but... i dont know....but thanks
     
  4. Jeff

    Full Member

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    You need to wait 1.5 or 2 years yet. I know being honest about who you are is the most important thing in your heart. But you are already honest in your heart. Outwardly it might be best to hold off until you are 50% or more done with the 12th grade.

    Once 12th is wrapping up it will be near time for everyone to move on anyway. And would be much safer for you. You need to consider your safety and security first.

    You know for sure when the time comes, and will not have any doubts. I think you are maybe a tad too young since you are playing football to be out.