I am coming up to my last 9 days at my school, as I will be taking my GCSE's very soon. My dilema is do I tell my friends? The posatives will be that I could feel like myself, and not constantly hiding who I am, but I really do not know how they will react. If o dont mention anything, what have I really achived, but is the streas just before my exams really worth it? My school is full of people, who make fun of those the slightest bit difefrent, and if people find out outside of my group of friends, how will they react? The second issue is my family. I have come out to both my Mum and my Brother, who both reacted pkay, yet my mum said it would be better not to tell other people.. (Which bothered me a bit, but thats another story). If it gets back to them, I feel like I have dissapointed them. Finally at the moment, I really do not want my Dad to find out. So what should I do? Tell people, and face the inevitable negative effects, or hide my true self like I have for many years?
From experience: your friends are the easiest people to come out to. No matter how how they act, or portray themselves, chances are they'd accept, and after a while it will be like nothing has changed. (Nothing has changed technically) but at first they will act surprised or will "deny" it at first. But it gets so much easier after that, trust me. If they're your real friends, they'll stay true to who you are. It will make you feel like less of a burden to yourself and release a huge amount of stress, and if that will help you with exams, then go for it bud. You've considered all the possible reactions, and you'll be willing to face the consequences good or bad. However the only thing that may worry you is that people of your friend group may find out, and a lot of things could happen that you wouldn't like. I told only 4 friends in year 8 that I was gay, and to this day I've lost count of all the friends that I've told. So it may not spread outside of your group if you tell them not to tell anyone else. That's up to you to decide if they're trustworthy enough. Your dad won't find out as long as your brother or mother do not tell him. I'd dread my dad finding out too, but I probably won't be telling my parents till I've moved out.
First thing's first - breathe. Second - are you able to tell them after you sit your GCSE's? I don't really know too much about GCSE's, being American, but if you can do that, you should come out AFTER sitting them. You're not gonna have as great as a performance on your tests if you're stressed. I don't think negative effects are exactly INEVITABLE, per se. I thought the same when I came out to my brother. A lot of time, it's just you overreacting; then again, I come from hippie town - most people are really accepting. I say test the waters. Maybe bring up something LGBT related, or just ask something a la 'what would you do if someone you knew came out to you?' See how they react, and then gauge their reactions on you coming out based on that. No matter what, living a lie is hell. It's torture, and I think anyone should avoid living lies at all costs (however, don't take these words too seriously). In the end, the final draw is your call, but you might wanna consider this first. If you do choose to come out, I wish you the best. *hugs for good luck* ~Sunshine
After you sit them unless something has changed that is the end of school, I think I remember going back for just a couple of days and then that was it, school over. It sounds like one of those situations where you could do either but coming out at the end of school may not actually gain you anything, how about the summer holidays? School is done, chances are you will be with the same friends, all the idiots won't be around and you can prepare yourself for going to college as gay.
