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FTM help!

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Teagan, Apr 22, 2013.

  1. Teagan

    Regular Member

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    Location:
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    Out Status:
    Not out at all
    Totally new to this, so here goes...

    Over the past year or so I've been slowly realizing that I'm trans and I think I've nearly accepted it. I've taken small, gradual steps to make myself feel more like myself (stopping shaving legs, etc.) and my mum has noticed. She keeps asking why I don't wear earrings anymore, and I desperately want to tell her why so I can start making bigger changes but I'm just so worried about it. Every time she and I are alone I can't stop thinking 'I need to tell her, she'll know what to do' but I can't bring myself to do it.

    I know she'll be okay with it, she's said before in jest that she was slightly disappointed that neither my brother or I were gay, and she's a nurse so is very open minded.
    I think it's because she's so good at sorting things out that I worry she'll try and get it done A.S.A.P. and I'm not sure I'm completely ready for that yet. I still have this sort of nagging worry that it's just a phase that I'm going through, but so many things that I've said, done, or thought before in my life make so much sense now...

    I suppose that I'm just asking for a bit of advice as to whether I should come out yet or leave it for a bit longer.

    Thanks.
     
  2. Sayu

    Full Member

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    Hmm, it looks like she really is very open minded... How old are you, if I can ask? If you want to come out to her and you're sure she will be ok with it, then do it :slight_smile: Maybe (if you're still not completely sure) don't use the word "trans", just start by telling her that you've come to a realization that you feel more like a male and that you would like to try and wear some men's clothes, get a short haircut, etc (if you don't already do/have that :grin:). That it could help you find out who you are. Also, she could go with you on a therapy (or you could go alone) where they would help you find out if you're a trans or if this is just some phase/it's not definite.

    Fingers crossed! (*hug*)
     
  3. Teagan

    Regular Member

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    I'm 19 but I'm an apprentice so I have a very small income and still rely a lot on my parents. I already have a short haircut (told her the hairdresser cut it shorter than I asked) and I've always worn clothes intended for women but that are on the more masculine end of the scale and I've never willingly worn makeup. She has asked a few times if I'm a lesbian probably because of this.

    Thanks for your response, I probably need to mull it over for a bit longer and try to sum up the courage to talk to her about it :slight_smile: