I recently spilled the beans to my sister (that I'm quite close with) about a number of other struggles currently driving me out of my mind. This led to her speaking with both her husband and our out of state aunt (who I'm also close with) about it, pretty much insuring that I have to deal with those things, though I've yet to say a word about my dysphoria. I should clarify that she did so with my consent. My aunt, who, to put it bluntly, isn't exactly broke, has pledged whatever financial resources are necessary to help, so I'll be talking with my sister again soon to figure out where to go from here, as it relates to those other things. Emotionally supportive sister? Emotionally and potential financially supportive aunt? Seems like the perfect storm to come out as trans, except that if they were the only ones I was dealing with, I'd have been fully transitioned by now. My family is quite large, with a plethora of aunts, uncles, cousins, nieces, nephews, etc... on both sides, more than a few of whom I'm not sure would be supportive, let alone still want me in their lives, and, supportive or not, it's an intimidating prospect. That's a mountain I'm not certain I can climb right now, yet I know that passing on this opportunity will continue leading me to a bad place. Guess we LGBT folks can't win, huh?
Speaking as someone who also has a large body of aunts and uncles: I understand. Not all of them do support my transition, but it isn't about them. It's about me finally deciding to do something for myself. That's what it comes down to: how long are you willing to put up with your dysphoria until you just can't anymore. I stopped caring about other people's happiness. How could I care when I no longer cared about myself? I needed a change and I got one. Some of my family came along and supported me, others didn't. Their loss. My mom and dad have eight brothers and sisters each, in case you're wondering.
That's quite a big family. Congrats on getting past that. I do find myself at the "I'm living a lie. Can't live like this anymore." stage, which is part of the reason I'm here. Forums like this are the closest I've come to actually saying the words. Ultimately, I can see the writing on the wall. I'm just trying to psyche myself into doing what I know I have to.
I hear you. I advise you to do things one-on-one. It's easier that way and people are less panicky on their own. Myself, my motivation was that I was becoming suicidal and I still had enough self-preservation left to not want to die. I hope it never gets to that point with you. Choosing to come out is better than being forced out from fear of your coming demise.
