Okay so, I am really having problems deciding where I want to go to college. There is a community college in my town and I could go there for two years, then transfer. But roughly 2 1/2 hours away is a large public college (this is where I would transfer after two years at community college). There seem to be pros and cons to both, but I really find my self changing my mind alot. I dont expect you to make the desicion for me, I suppose I am just looking to see what other people would do in my situation. Communty College +free tuition for two years. +I get to stay in my own home. +I know more people. +alot of my friends are still juniors, so I would still get to see them alot more. +alot easier to get a job and maintain a social life. +alot easier classes. +alot less gas. +I do winterguard, so I could stay around and help. -My mother and I have alot of arguments sometimes. This will leave me in that enviornment. -I will still be living under the watchfull eye of my mother. -no real independence. Bigger ( but still small ) University +Independence +Away from my Mother +Seems to be more respected when looking at it from a career stand point. +I have already spend $150 on housing +Its a new enviornment with new people +Much easier place to meet people. +People are much more accepting of not-straigh-ness (this is really an assumption) -I only know like four people. -Housing -Away from my friends -Between a job and class I would never be able to come home, or see my friends. So, give me your input. I highly appreciate it.
Are you out to your mother? I'm assuming not from what you said. Is part of the attraction of the bigger college that you will be better able to come out there than closer to home? A fresh start with new people and the real you?
Im not out to my mother, though I am pretty sure she suspects (she asked me once. I lied, wuss.). To be perfectly honest I dont think being at college will be any easier coming out to people, and in the past few monthes I have actually told a few people close to home. I dunno, I think right now, my sexuality isnt the most important thing in this desicison, and for the most part right now, I think everyone that needs to know at this point and time does.
This is always a tough decision. I think its great you are kind of weighing it out in writing. I can't really help you one way or the other but I will say that don't let the fact that not seeing your friends much be a deterrent. I think friendships really grow and change after high school no matter what you do. Making new friends is a good thing and you are probably more likely to be able to be yourself at a bigger university. Being away from your parents is an important step to growing up too. Good luck!
I realize I shouldnt let my friends play such a large roll in my descisions, but I cant really help it. For a large portion of my life I didnt really have any close friends. It was a really long time that I felt really alone and didnt have anyone to talk to about things. And now that I do, it seems like they are the most important people in my life, and I cant help but worry about leaving them. I realize I cant base my entire descision on them, but they do play a role in it. I appreciate the advice, and I wish I could more easily follow it, I just cant though.
Go to the bigger university. It's vitally important to live away from your parents if you ever want to develop as a person and while it's hard to leave friends behind, you'll find it's usually exceptionally easy to make new friends at university if you're at all inclined that way. Plus bigger institutions tend to offer more interesting programs and not knowing that many people actually allows you a lot more leeway to figure out who you're going to be. If you're already butting heads with your mother, I don't see how there's any real choice. I left home at 21 but I really should have left about a year earlier (at least).
I'd recommend the bigger university. There's going to be a lot more courses at the bigger university, and employers have a tendency to give priority to the bigger institutions. But if you can't decide, don't; you can always take a year off and take some time for yourself, maybe travel.
So, I talked to my mom about it. She really understands that I need the independence, but neither of us feel like I am ready to go to a bigger university that far from home at this time. I think what I may do is move in with my brother. He is 21 and paralyzed in a wheelchair, so he needs the help. I will be able to go to the community college but I will also get the independence because my brother is really cool and wouldn't try to be a parent type person. This is of course just an option, and I really don't know what I am going to do, but it is really cool that my mom gets it.
I would choose the bigger one. My sis just went to college and the thing all of the students said were "you can make a big school feel small, but you cant make a small school big" There are a TON of more things you can do at even just a slightly larger school, you can choose if u want a smaller group of friends or a larger one.
I stay at home for collage because for me it's substantial savings in the cost of housing. Some people are graduating with huge debts while I've going to be debt free. We do have 2 community collages, and 3 universities in town (one of which is relatively large). Even though I live at home, I spend a lot of time at school or with my friends so I do have a fair bit of independence. Home is really just a place to eat supper and crash for the night. I've done a couple work terms where I lived away from home and I wasn't hopeless living on my own for those periods, so I don't know how vital it is moving out as quick as possible. I did first year at one university then changed programs into engineering and went to another one for two years. In both cases it was a fresh start where I didn't know anyone in my class, but that's really the case with everyone else and pretty soon I made new friends. You mention the bigger collage is more respected career wise. Is it truly a better school in terms of quality of education, facilities, etc? If so that might be a good choice. As well it sounds like a bit of an adventure. Is the bigger school in a bigger city? That might provide other exciting things to do.
You can go to the local university for the first couple of years and then transfer to the larger university to complete your degree. This gives you the benefit of a smaller university (small class sizes, lower cost) and the benefit of the larger university (name recognition, more choice in classes, independence). Just keep your class syllabi and the college catalogs for the years you attend the community college. This helps with getting credits when you transfer. When you get a degree, the name of the university where you graduated is what goes on the diploma. No one will care that you attended a smaller college for your first two years.
From what I read into your pros and cons it sound like the bigger university would be a better fit for you. You said that a lot of your friends are still Juniors, and thats great but they are still in high school and while you can still be friends with them you will also want friends at school and its much harder to develop friendships at a commuter school. You also listed only knowing 4 people at the larger school as a con but at a larger residential school you will live and hangout with people and bonds develope quickly and those 4 people you know will help you meet even more people. Plus your junior friends will probably want to come and visit.
