So I'm approaching my senior year in a few weeks, I go to a private Christain school, and everyone is homophobic. I have to listen to people talking about beating gays, calling then every name in the book, downing gay marriage, saying adopting kids to a gay couple is awful, discriminating against us, and talking about killing them. Every day. I am 17 and have known that i am a lesbian for a while now, I just don't see why they can't understand that love is love no matter what gender or race you are. Anyway, I'm just having a hard time with dealing with this daily...
Is anybody directly discriminating against you personally, or is it just being said? And are these students who are saying these things (with teachers simply letting it slip by), or are teachers joining in as well? Christian school or not, I would question teachers' professionalism if they were making any sort of prejudiced comments to colleagues and students (but especially the latter). I went to a Catholic comprehensive school in a small town and the environment and attitudes there probably forced me so far into the closet that I was afraid to come out only until around the age of 24, when in fact uni would have been the perfect place to come out in hindsight (but anyway...). I think that a lot of the homophobia at school tended to stem from small town attitudes, though, with religion generally just reaffirming the distrust (and an excuse for teachers not to do much about it). In fact, a lot of my fellow students were also quite racist, xenophobic and sexist. It used to really get up my nose, especially since so many of them were academically very able, probably more so than me. I can say that I did clash with them on the subject of values on more than one occasion, though never physically. Anyway, my main advice to you would be just to hang on in there, as you've only got a little longer left. I'll also say that I think the best way to deal with their ignorance is to think that they're the problem, not you. It may not seem it all the time, but there's a good chance they're the way they are because they're unhappy about themselves. There are probably lots of reasons for this, but a good chance is a feeling of inadequacy about not fitting the norm, and are simply taking their anger out on things that they think fit the norm less than they do. Who knows, some of them may be secretly gay. To pity them is to simply rise above them.
No, it's not being said against me, no one knows that I am gay and sadly, yes, the teachers are in on I as well.. Thank u for the advice, it's nice to get advice from someone who went through this as well.
I am a christian also and its very sad that homophobia is being tolerated in school especially from a religious school thats supposed to foster love and care for others. i can see how it can take a toll on you. but maybe you can speak out against it. sometimes thats all it takes.. when people start saying homophobic things say something like.. hey thats not cool or you find it really offensive. its just like bullying.. sometimes all it takes for one person to stand up against it and others will find the courage to speak up aswell.. you dont have to declare that you are gay.. just stand up for human rights in general. or if you feel you might be in danger then it might be safer to speak to principal and tell them whats happening.
I totally understand how you feel. I go to a private christian school too, and 95% of people are homophobes. It really brings me down hearing all the shit they say about us, and just trying to beat us down. I hear stupid stuff like "being gay is a choice" and "gay people should go get cancer and die" pretty much every day. When in reality, churches are supposed to teach about accepting everyone for who they are. It makes no sense at all. My strategy: try and find at least one person who can stay on your side. If people can't accept you for you, they don't deserve to be your friend. Try and stay positive. Just think of yourself as the amazing person you really are, and don't let other people bring you down. It's a hard journey, but you can make it through. I believe in you.
Oh my...I went to a private Christian high school...Baptist. The experience did damage that I wouldn't realize until later in life. It hurt me quite a bit. They used fear as a way of controlling us and it worked. They openly preached that evolution was of the devil. They didn't believe in inter-racial marriage (I hope at least that has changed now). They called the TV the hellevision. Would you believe they didn't even want us to see movies. Luckily they didn't really enforce that. My senior year we all had to see the pastor of the church that was associated with the school. He grilled me about if I ever had alcohol or drugs. If you answered yes, you wouldn't graduate. Fortunately gay issues weren't discussed and I was way in the closet. I still deal with a very religious family that is opposed to gay rights. It's hard... I know. Hang in there...one more year. Just don't go to Bob Jones University for college!
