My method of telling people I'm gay is isolating them, and letting them know face-to-face. This way, it's 100% proper, and we can talk about it comfortably. I also ask them to keep it to themselves, so everyone can find out directly from me. The first week, I told about ten people. However, after about five or six times, it became a bit monotonous. I mean, it's nice to tell those that I need to (and I only tell those to whom I think it's important to tell), but at the same time, I feel like I'm burning out by using this "intimate" method. Because I have an obsessive mind, I can't wait to tell people! I think the sooner people know, the better, so I won't have to hide anything. I really believe that being open about personal issues is quite cathartic; therefore, I'd like to be able to freely express what I need to. I'm not sure if I really need to ask any questions, but I will anyways: • Is there any other way to tell people that has as much integrity as face-to-face, one-on-one? • Any tips for not burning out? (side note: I have the same exact feeling when telling people I'm going to grad school; I'm extremely excited about it, but I'm growing fatigued of letting people know!)
Congrats on grad school! Some options: My friend came out on facebook after her close friends knew. Come out to close friends in groups. It can be less exhausting than one-on-one, but still intimate. Wear a rainbow bracelet or a triangle pin or an equals sign or some other queer symbol you identify with. If you want people to have zero doubts, this rainbow sequin jacketwill come out for you AND add a touch of class to any outfit.
I tried to do it face to face every time, because i do think it shows respect to your friends. However i could only come out drunk, so it took two attempts for my best mate to believe me! I ended up telling 4 people face to face, i told 3 in a group, the first by facebook, one by phone and 2 by text I would say its only important to say face to face to close friends, anyone else its less important to even know. I was like an excited child telling people when i came out, it really is a great feeling! Something to think about though, instead of isolating them now, if theres 3 of you, and youve already told one (or any other number of them) you could just mention it in conversation? I know it can make them feel like theyre the last to know, but if you explain it could be ok. Less laborious but maybe more risky?
Good luck with grad school! Anyway...I did it through FB message since it would eliminate drama and the like. I then would talk to the individual via phone, going to hang out with them the next day, etc. Good luck to you, and we're here if you need help or have questions
I agree with wanderinggirl. If you come out to friends in groups (about 3-5 people), it can still be intimate while not being as exhausting. It also gets it done quicker (3-5 times faster) than one-on-one. Good luck and congrats on grad school!
Thanks everyone. I really only have a couple people I need to tell, other than that, it'll be on a need-to-know basis (or if it just comes up). But the rainbow sequin jacket might do the trick. Maybe I'll wear it to my cousin's wedding.
