I watched a coming out video earlier today where somebody was told by their therapist to write a letter to their parents telling them that they are gay, but not necessarily one that they had to send to them. I thought this would probably be a great idea to build up the courage to tell them...but for some reason, I'm even too nervous to write the letter. I just wouldn't know what to say or how to start it. I need to come out to them soon. I want to move on with my life and meet somebody, do things other (almost) 20 year old people are doing. I'm just sat here crying, drinking and it seems like my life is just an endless road of nothing. I feel like I'm sat here waiting to die. I simply can't move on with my life if my parents don't know who I am. I will appreciate any advice.
just start writing. The letter doesn't need to make perfect sense or be in any order, begin writing to get your thoughts out for a start, then move on from there.
Even getting my thoughts out and directing it towards them scares me to death. I'll give it a try, but I still struggle saying that I'm gay out loud, even though I'm comfortable with it...
Although the man I came out to was not my father, he was there for me and supported me just like a father should, so I experienced similar emotions, thoughts and feelings when I was writing the letter. I wanted it to be perfect. I wanted to scrunch it up every time I wrote it. I wish I didn't have to do it - but he meant too much for me to be able to move on without letting him know. I finally managed to push my self to give it to him, eagerly but anxiously waiting for what he would have to say. My advice to you: Just be honest, write down all thoughts and feelings, good or bad. Let your parents know truly how you feel, and how you hope they will take it. Prepare yourself for the worst, but hope for the best. You can do it, no matter how much you tell your self you can't, it will only make the urge to do it stronger. (*hug*)
Lewis, don't feel too nervous or put under pressure by the need to write the letter. Maybe start with something addressed to yourself might help you. Just to get your thoughts together. Take you're time, nobody is watching you or judging you. What you write on that paper may never be read by other eyes than your own. Speaking of waiting to die (something on a sidenote, trust me, it's worth it ), I watched a documentary about litterature and writing at school. One small no-name writer here in Germany said something like this "Writing and documenting one's life is the preperation for death." :lol: I found it quite a silly thing to say, picturing that non-writers would get in trouble with the reaper xD but I see the deeper meaning. What I'm trying to say is, go write your feelings down. It doesn't have to be to your parents, hell, it doesn't even have to be in the form of a letter. just start in one corner and write it in a circle if you'd like Just make sure you express yourself somehow. It will feel much more clearer in your head.
Thanks Yeah, it makes sense that the people I care about the most should know. I just wish I didn't have to tell them, that they would come to me and ask. Life isn't that easy though...
