I have recently moved to a new city and befriended a gay guy who seemed nice at first but now I just can't stand him anymore. He's too bossy, annoying and acts really badly - he's what you'd call a sassy bitch. He had an argument with a friend and turned all of his other friends against her, something I thought only existed in fiction. He does horrible things to people and doesn't care. I don't want to be friends with him anymore but there is a problem: his parents are very close to mine and I have made the mistake of telling him I'm attracted to men. I'm really scared that he might tell my parents if I say something bad to him. Now bear with me, I really want to come out to my parents, but there's another problem: my father is a raging homophobe. I'll never forget one day that there was a reality show on TV and it showed two guys kissing, which had him comment: "I can't believe they're showing this on television! An uninformed boy with a gullible mind may say 'This is normal' and turn into a fag. [...] Son, there are three things that if you'd do that would make me very disappointed: if you turn into a criminal, if you turn into a drug addict or if you turn into a fag.". I'm not flamboyant or anything, and actually, I look and act very masculine not to hide my sexuality or anything, but it's actually my way of being. I've never acted feminine so maybe he doesn't have a clue. My mother, on the other hand, I'm pretty sure she knows. She's been giving me hints but once she said something that really hurt me: "I think that these people should hide their feelings". I don't want to have a boyfriend, I've never even kissed a guy and I honestly don't look forward to doing so anytime soon. I just want my parents to know exactly who I am; I'm tired of lying everyday. I really want to tell at least my mom, but I was looking into doing it way later, as I don't want to start dating or anything. But now I face this horrible dilemma: if I tell this boy I don't want to be friends with him anymore, he'll make my parents know about me, but I just can't stand him anymore. I really need advice and I'll be forever grateful to anyone who helps me. Thank you for your time.
I'd say go to a counselor or trusted friend. You need someone to let your emotions out on. Having them in there bottled up is not healthy. Secondly, why does your father have being gay listed something as bad as a criminal? So I guess getting a girl pregnant is okay, based on what you told me? Dropping out of school is okay? Tell your mom, since she can help you if your dad doesn't take the news well. You can't live your life like this. If your dad doesn't except it...then guess what? You didn't lose a father. You lost a negative influence. He lost a great son aka he'll hurt more than you will.
