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I think I'm ready. How do I do this?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Turbo Turtle, Jun 8, 2013.

  1. Turbo Turtle

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    I want to come out. Tonight.

    As discussed in this thread, my cousin is gay. He's who I want to start with. Mostly for support, but also because I really want to start things with a positive response. Build some confidence, you know?

    I'm going to send him a message on Facebook.

    I don't know how to do it. How do I word it? :help:

    This is so stressful. I need cookies.
     
  2. KnownSecret

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    Just go with the flow and start talking :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes: somewhere in the middle throw in a question to him like when did you first know you were gay (or ease into the topic of sexuality). After your in to the conversation about sexuality then that's where it gets easy, just tell him your gay. Just go with the flow and everything will be okay :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes: Or you could take the more direct approach and say hey I want to talk to you, is anyone around you. Then if he says no then say, I know that I can trust you with this and I have been wanting to tell you for a while, so I am just going to come out and say it now, I'm gay :wink:

    Good luck on coming out! I know your cousin will accept you for being gay cause he's gay as well :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes: He cannot judge you! Just keep that in mind!

    ~Zack~
     
  3. LD579

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    It depends on how close you are to this cousin. You could tell him that you want to talk to him about something serious and important, perhaps. He likely would understand the importance of you telling him, and I'm hoping he'll be supportive and kind =)

    Any words you choose will suffice. They're your words, and you can't go wrong with them.
     
  4. tmhjdg

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    When I came out for one of the first times to a close friend over facebook, I did it via chat, back before chat and messaging were the same thing. I started with something like:

    "Can I talk to you for a minute?" (again, it was via chat) and then said something like "I wanted to talk to you because I trust you and I know you're a mature enough person to listen to what I'm saying."

    That was basically my opening statement. Kinda empowers your cousin and yourself at the same time. Then you just type "I'm gay" right after that, and go into whatever details you need to go into.

    Hope my intro helps somewhat!
     
  5. Turbo Turtle

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    Considering he hasn't been online for days... I think I'm just going to send him the all-inclusive message.

    I don't think slipping it in the conversation will work too well with sporadic messages.

    I'm not waiting. I need to get it off my chest. The stress is becoming just... SO unbearable. I can, at the very least, write up a draft in Google Drive. Then I can obsess over it for the next few days like a psychotic mother bear with her cubs. Ugh.

    I've never been so on-edge in my life. Anxiety sucks. :icon_sad:

    ---------- Post added 9th Jun 2013 at 12:58 AM ----------

    You know what? No. I'm doing parsed messages. Screw all-encompassing confessions of one of my most frustrating secrets.
     
  6. Martjain

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    Haha you're awesome!
    I think you should tell him in a conversation, not just plain confession, but try to slip in the topic quickly, cause he may leave on a whim.
     
  7. Turbo Turtle

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    I've decided to just parse it out. I've started with:

    We shall see how things play out.