I'm Bi and thinking of coming out with it, however I'm not sure who I should come out to first and what I should say when I do. Don't mind too much about telling my mum and stepdad, however I am slightly anxious about telling my dad as I am not sure how he will react. Can anyone please help me, any advice, tips, tricks etc would be much appreciated Thanks guys and girls. (*hug*)
Hi there! Hm, a few thoughts, in no particular order. If you're okay with telling your mum and stepdad, then go ahead and do so. Coming out gets easier with practice, like most things do, so starting with people who should react well is often useful (although I infer from your out status setting that you've already told some friends, which is great!). Depending on your mum and dad's relationship with each other and on how your mother reacts, she might be able to give you tips on coming out to your father too. You could bring up, say, gay marriage with your father -- the recent stuff in the US could provide a discussion starter -- and use it to find out what he thinks of gay rights, and of gay/bi people in general. Whatever his opinion, knowing is probably better than not knowing, although bear in mind that people can react differently to LGBT people in general and LGBT people right here, like a bisexual son. Before coming out to your father, whenever you choose to do so -- soon or in a long time, it's likely fine either way, be sure to think about questions he may ask and how you want to answer them. If you think it'd be helpful, try writing a private FAQ of such things so that you get practice answering the questions fluently. You might want to use a letter to come out to him if you remain very anxious, because it can reduce the emotional tension in coming out, give you space to say everything you want to say, and emphasise that you are taking it seriously. That may or may not help. Whatever happens and whatever you do, I hope that it goes well! (*hug*)
If you're super worried about it maybe there's no need for ya to come out right away huh? =] I always got the impression that coming out is usually something that you do as a show of faith in someone you trust and feel comfortable confiding in something as personal as your sexuality. Have any of the people you're thinking about telling acted supportive of LGBT rights or the community in some form? If so, and if you feel alright about talking with them about your sexuality and related subjects, you're probably good to go. I'd say think it over for a bit, just to be safe. Also make sure you aren't doing this because you feel pressured into coming out or anything like that. Not like it's a race or anything~ my mom's known about my sexuality for 3 or so years and my dad still doesn't. ^_^
