should i come out in college?

It's better to tell everyone right when you start college, so you don't get attached to someone (as a friend) and then if you were to come out it would be harder for them but they thought you were straight. Coming out right when you get college can also help you find the right friends who will accept you right away.

 

I'm going through the exact same thing. I'm going to college in two months and I feel really pressured to tell my family and friends before I go. Maybe I should just go and tell people there and then come out later on. Hmm, that actually sounds like a good plan. I really appreciate this thread.

 

I went to a year of college before I came out to my family. I plan to come out at college this fall. I needed the year to become more comfortable with myself. It's working out so far, but scared as heck to tell my teammates/coach/professors.

 

I personally plan on coming out as soon as I get to college. I am ready to just live my life and be myself and college is the perfect place for that. I am so suppressed here that I am bursting at the seams almost. College seems like a really great opportunity for a fresh start, I say go for it

 

This. It's exactly the rut I am in since I didn't do it when I first went to college. So I will probably wait until I graduate in a year. I advise you to come out right when you start university.

As for the second question, I don't know how to answer that. In the last three years I have been asked if I was gay once, and it was a girl going around a circle asking all of the guys. So, nobody would find out if I rely on "are you gay?" I think the general consensus is that is rude to ask... I would think of some way of making it known you are gay.

 

I am currently in college right now, and most of the people that I know from before I came out to them, they already suspected, one was actually slightly surprised. But anyway, when you feel like coming out is when you should.

 

I don't think it's likely that somebody is going to come right out and ask if you're gay. I think that if you want to be out in college, you should just let things go with the flow. Don't just come right out and tell people unsolicited, but if the topic of dating and sex and stuff comes up, you can just casually say "oh yeah, actually I'm gay." If you don't make a big deal about it, the people around you are less likely to make a big deal about it too.

 

You don't have to come out in college if you don't want to, do it when you feel comfortable, I am only out too a few people (mum, sister and 1 friend). I don't feel fully comfortable telling anyone else yet, so just do it when you are ready, no rush at all.

 

You don't necessarily have to come out during college, but it's actually better to do it. Our generation is more accepting towards LGBT and in college, most of us are mature enough to accept it.

 

For me coming out in college was one the best decisions I ever made, but also one of the hardest. I went through my first year very closeted and depressed and it finally got to me. I came out to my mom last September right before my second year of college and came out at school as soon as it started. I found out a few of my friends were gay/bi and I started meeting some really cool people in my school's LGBT community, including my boyfriend I'm much happier and haven't encountered much homophobia and I'm pretty unapologetic about my sexuality, I wear a shirt sometimes that says "I didn't choose to be a homosexual, I just got lucky!" actually been complemented on it a few times.

I didn't make a point of coming out, I just acted like everyone knew and brought it up when relevant(i.e. talking about dating/LGBT issues) and pretty soon most people knew.

 

I'm also going away to college pretty soon and I'm kind of looking at it as a chance to finally have a space where I'm out. I think you're best bet is to just be kind of casual and open about being gay and sort of let things happen from there. The way I figure, the people you're meeting won't necessarily have as much of a preconceived notion that you're straight and that should make it easier for them to accept... or at least that's my plan

You also mentioned not being out to friends an family, which is where I'm at too. And I guess I have this fear that once I have that it will be harder and harder to step back into the closet when I'm home. And I really don't feel ready to come out at home. I just don't know how I could reconcile those two atmospheres? Not that it stops me from wanting to be out in college, but it does seem to put a damper on things...