Well, I was going to a new barber shop (I can't seem to stick with just one for some reason, and there's an abundance around here, so why not?) Anyhow, this guy was asking me stuff like are you married (no), do you have a girlfriend? To that I responded "no, and I don't have a boyfriend either" which was enough to get the point across. He then said something to his colleague in a language that I didn't understand (Italian?) and the only word that I could pick up was "gay". All of this came so naturally, so why can't I do the same with people that are close to me? I'm fine telling someone that I just met 10 minutes ago, but not people I've known for years? What sense does that make?
Could it be fear of losing them? Or fear that they may not be the tolerant people you thought they were? I'm not worried about telling people I'm gay, but I dont have that many friends, and particularly cos I rent a room in one of their houses, I dont want to find out that they have an issue with me being gay. I also still kind of feel like because I've acted/said otherwise up until now, I'd have to 'convince' them I'm telling the truth.. which would be alot easier if they just saw me getting it on with a guy or checking one out or something
This reminds me of the time I was working as an election judge (those people that help out at the polls) and two of the older judges were talking about me, in which I heard the word "homosexual" in Spanish. It was very humiliating, considering I was paired up with a Hispanic guy who must've heard and understood what they said.
It's soo much easier to come out to someone you aren't close to because if you loose them it's not a very big deal. Me on the other hand, my barber IS like a sacred individual. (My hair is very important to me) He has told me numerous times about his gay friends (he's straight) and how his gf made him go to a gay bar and this was all in general conversation, but I've yet to tell him. Idk why.
