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A ravers Razors edge of coming out.

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by Suede, May 7, 2008.

  1. Suede

    Regular Member

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    Location:
    Pacific north west
    Gender:
    Male
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Long before i came out, offically, or even just to any family member. I realized that I despised sex with females, no offense to anyone, it was just incredibly unfullfilling and downright bad feeling afterwords. like i was five and been told id done something wrong. No idea how to explain it beyond thta.

    Id had "gay" experiences with friends before. Digging them, loving and cherishing thos memries through my four (with three) experiences with females and doing my best. Id had to be "altered" chemically through each experience. I finally realized one day, while talking to a friends flamer friend, that i wanted to well.. have sex with him so badly i ached. That i wanted a male as my partner for all things. I basically cried for a long while. drank a ton.

    Fast forward, im hooking up, having fun with guys at after rave parties, but its pointless. Only one friend knows im out. Basically because shes like a female marquis desade and scared me quite a bit. right after, id rebuilt and made a new cabinet for a '69 packard bell tv set anhd was watching dean martin dvds on it, and came out all of a sudden to my visiting mom. basically in a "your fine tyhat you know i wont have kids, my brothers is enough for you isnt is?". all she said is "are you gay" and my "prolly, i know i dont like being with women".

    of course she later blackmailed me with it, but thats not part of this story. for the first bit, it was very positive.
     
  2. biisme

    Full Member

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    well, i'm glad that you came out, but what is this about blackmail!?
     
  3. Davo

    Full Member

    Joined:
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    Location:
    Scotland
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Good for you for coming to terms with yourself and for coming out! I'm interested to hear more about this blackmail though. Your mother was positive at first, I hope things haven't changed too much for the worst