Truth is, I know what everyone's reactions are going to be, and I'm prepared for whatever rejection I'll get from my mom and younger brother and whatever support I'll get from my dad and sister. I posted here when I joined like half a year ago that I was planning on coming out to my sister, and I haven't done it yet. It's not that I don't want to come out, or that I'm at all afraid of it, I just don't want to deal with it. Yeah, so I'm really confused as to what to do now...
I'm actually the same way (although with slightly different people). Since I'm going to college in September people keep asking me if I'm gonna be out there and I say no only because I don't want to deal with it either. My opinion for you though is that if your sister is going to be good with it, it might help to have her know. You can never have too many allies.
I have many fears inside of my family reactions as well. I can see them now, my mom will cry, my dad will yell, one sister will think it's 'un-natural' the other two might be ok, and the other one will pray for me to be 'normal' again. But before I even get to that road, I guess I am going to have to fully come out to myself before anyone else comes into the picture, huh. That is a scarry thought for me, even though deep down I know it's true. It will be a long road, of that I am sure. And I am so glad that I found this wonderful support site to help me along the way.
Just take it day by day. There is no reason to come out unless, and until, you feel like it. If it does not feel like the right time, don't. There is nothing that says you have to come out at all. You also don't have to come out to everyone. When the time is right, you will feel it.
But I do feel like coming out. I'm just too lazy to. And I'm not afraid of my parent's reactions or my friend's reactions as far as I know... bah, I'm probably just in denial.
That's totally different than my comment, sorry. May I ask, WHY? I guess that is what I would really want to dig deep into my feelings to find out. I does sound a bit like denial. It seems a little difficult to understand why you wouldn't want to openly be who you are, particularly if you are confident and prepared for what the reactions will be. I can't wait until the day I am able to be me and not have to hide my feelings, or anything. So, true, I don't completely understand.
Took the words out of my Mo... Keyboard. Well you think about it, there's not really anything to coming out if you're fine with it. If you expect and can handle other peoples reaction then that means you don't care what they think (which is good), how much effort is it to say 'Im Gay' then to ignore anything negative they say?
Well I know that I'll have to babysit my mom all summer if I come out, and since this is my last year at home, that would totally ruin my social life.
You've got to come out to yourself before you can come out to the world hon. Trust me. I have done that...I'm just scared of the world
I cant be bothered either bcoz i dont see the point, the only way I might come out if someone asks or something
Like I said in post #9, the overrulling reason I have that I'm not out is that I know that it will take a ton of work to get my mom up to acceptance, and I really don't want to have to spend the 3-8 months I'm predicting to get her up to at least tolerance. Becky/Louise? help please? oh and can a mod move this into support and advice please?
Reading your posts a few times, I was struck that you are repeating that it will take some time/ involve work for you to get your mom to accept you. Can it be that somewhere in all of this you are afraid that your mom will not accept you?
From my experience(i just came out a couple of months ago) I say its best to wait. If your not ready to deal with it then leave it a secret it'd be easier that way. If you come out when your not ready you will regret it and be pretty angry with yourself. "I should have stayed quiet" "It wouldn't have been like this if i didn't say anything". If your ready to say to yourself you don't care then all the power to you. But if your still debating it then i would keep it a secret until your sure you can deal with it.(many of us keep it in the closet for a long time; some never say a thing) But I wish you luck on this(and most moms are usually pretty accepting now adays(most))
